1 00:00:18,619 --> 00:00:23,557 * HEY, MOM, that's who I am A selfish bastard* 2 00:00:23,591 --> 00:00:27,128 * I stare through DIRTY WINDOWS * 3 00:00:27,161 --> 00:00:29,197 * AT FUMBLED D.N.A. 4 00:00:29,230 --> 00:00:31,832 * YOU STUMBLE NOW UPRIGHT* 5 00:00:31,865 --> 00:00:34,602 *WE'RE COMING DOWN 6 00:00:34,635 --> 00:00:37,405 *TO ARTIFICIAL BLUE 7 00:00:37,438 --> 00:00:39,840 * WHERE ALL THE CRAZIES ARE * 8 00:00:39,873 --> 00:00:42,143 *THEY ARE CRAZY JUST LIKE ME* 9 00:00:42,176 --> 00:00:44,245 *UNLESS I AM PROTECTED 10 00:00:44,278 --> 00:00:49,750 * OUT OF THE COLD 11 00:00:50,784 --> 00:00:52,753 *OH DARLING, HOLD ME TIGHT 12 00:00:52,786 --> 00:00:55,656 * THIS IS NOT WHAT YOUR TEETH HAS TO CLATCH* 13 00:00:55,689 --> 00:01:01,429 * WE CAN SMILE 14 00:01:01,462 --> 00:01:04,198 * In putrid, senile faces 15 00:01:04,232 --> 00:01:06,700 * TAX WHERE OUR SPACE IS 16 00:01:06,734 --> 00:01:12,473 * MAN, THIS IS LOVE 17 00:01:12,506 --> 00:01:15,109 * LOVE 18 00:01:15,143 --> 00:01:18,078 * LOVE LOVE LOVE 19 00:01:34,228 --> 00:01:36,630 *OH, BABY, GET ME EVERYTHING 20 00:01:36,664 --> 00:01:39,433 * FRESHLY STRENGTHENED ON STIMULANTS 21 00:01:39,467 --> 00:01:42,870 * MY STEMS IS STOUT FROM CAFFEINE * 22 00:01:42,903 --> 00:01:45,773 * Soaked petals, FRAGRANCE, NICOTINE * 23 00:01:45,806 --> 00:01:48,442 * AND I WILL SLEEP UNTIL 8:30 * 24 00:01:48,476 --> 00:01:50,444 * IN THE MORNING 25 00:01:50,478 --> 00:01:53,881 *WAKE ME GENTLY 26 00:01:53,914 --> 00:01:56,217 * LIKE A BIRD OF PARADISE 27 00:01:56,250 --> 00:01:58,619 * MY AGENDA IS MY VICE 28 00:01:58,652 --> 00:02:01,789 * AND I AM FULLY CLOTHED WITH NOWHERE * 29 00:02:01,822 --> 00:02:04,492 *TO GO, MAN 30 00:02:04,525 --> 00:02:07,195 * GET OUT, MAN 31 00:02:07,228 --> 00:02:09,897 *Freak out, man... 32 00:02:09,930 --> 00:02:13,167 Man: I live there with you. 33 00:02:13,201 --> 00:02:16,737 I'll come over at 12:30 p.m to collect my extra money. 34 00:02:16,770 --> 00:02:18,239 Your landlord. 35 00:02:18,272 --> 00:02:20,708 *Freak out, man. 36 00:02:31,885 --> 00:02:33,754 - (kicks) -MM. 37 00:02:33,787 --> 00:02:35,423 (whispering) JAKE, JAKE. 38 00:02:35,456 --> 00:02:37,491 STAND UP. WAKE UP. 39 00:02:39,360 --> 00:02:41,462 I just received a message FROM STU. He knows you did it I stayed here. 40 00:02:41,495 --> 00:02:44,298 YOU MUST GO. He's on his way here. COME ON LET'S GO. STAND UP. 41 00:02:44,332 --> 00:02:47,235 - GOOD MORNING. - HELLO. GOOD MORNING. 42 00:02:55,343 --> 00:02:56,910 GOD DAMMIT. 43 00:03:07,588 --> 00:03:10,224 Do you see what you've done? You're tearing my life apart APARTMENT, JAKE. 44 00:03:10,258 --> 00:03:11,859 THERE IS SOMEONE AT THE DOOR. 45 00:03:11,892 --> 00:03:14,828 DON'T MOVE. REMAIN. REMAIN. 46 00:03:18,432 --> 00:03:21,302 HEY, STU. 47 00:03:21,335 --> 00:03:23,404 DO YOU WANT BREAKFAST? HOW ARE YOU DOING? YOU HUNGRY? 48 00:03:23,437 --> 00:03:25,406 OH, I would have liked some lunch. YOU KNOW WHAT? 49 00:03:25,439 --> 00:03:27,675 I WANT A NEIGHBORHOOD OF GREEN. 50 00:03:27,708 --> 00:03:29,977 THAT WOULD TWO EXTRA INVOICES PER MONTH. 51 00:03:30,010 --> 00:03:32,980 AND I NEED $1,000 IN RENT BACK, OR TWO OF YOU-- 52 00:03:33,013 --> 00:03:35,749 - THERE'S ONLY ONE. - Nonsense, there is only one! 53 00:03:35,783 --> 00:03:37,351 I--HE-- NOBODY-- 54 00:03:37,385 --> 00:03:39,253 WHAT IS THAT? HA, look at that. 55 00:03:39,287 --> 00:03:40,654 HELLO. HOW ARE YOU DOING? CUTE NIPPLES. 56 00:03:40,688 --> 00:03:42,723 Hello, STU, HOW ARE YOU? 57 00:03:42,756 --> 00:03:44,325 “HEY, STU, WHAT HAPPENS?" HUH? 58 00:03:44,358 --> 00:03:46,026 IS THAT COOL? ARE YOU COOL? 59 00:03:46,059 --> 00:03:48,329 - He just spent the night, STU. - YOU KNOW WHAT? NOT. 60 00:03:48,362 --> 00:03:50,364 HE HANGS OUT FOR A FEW DAYS. 61 00:03:50,398 --> 00:03:53,667 FALL FOR A FEW DAYS? NOT. NOT. JUST DON’T Play me as an idiot. 62 00:03:53,701 --> 00:03:57,004 - Nobody calls you an IDIOT. - WE ALL KNOW HOW SMART YOU ARE. 63 00:03:57,037 --> 00:04:00,541 Don't play stupid with me, Because Ms. SMALL ALREADY I was kidding you. 64 00:04:00,574 --> 00:04:04,011 So I want you both... PAY OR GO OUT! 65 00:04:04,044 --> 00:04:06,013 I'm sorry, guys. 66 00:04:06,046 --> 00:04:08,749 HE--HE ASKED ME QUESTIONS. 67 00:04:08,782 --> 00:04:12,320 I'm disappointed, madam. SMALL, VERY DISAPPOINTED. 68 00:04:12,353 --> 00:04:14,322 Stu: It's okay, woman. SMALL. 69 00:04:14,355 --> 00:04:16,424 LISTEN, YOU JUST KEEP IT THIS SOCIAL SECURITY Checks are coming 70 00:04:16,457 --> 00:04:18,459 AND I'M IN To rub your corns. 71 00:04:18,492 --> 00:04:19,993 THIS IS DISGUSTING. 72 00:04:20,027 --> 00:04:21,895 THIS IS DISGUSTING? I'll tell you what's gross. 73 00:04:21,929 --> 00:04:24,298 YOU TWO MEN IN A ONE-ROOM HOUSE. 74 00:04:24,332 --> 00:04:27,601 YOU TWO MEN Do things with each other. 75 00:04:27,635 --> 00:04:29,603 - THIS IS DISGUSTING. - I don't think that... 76 00:04:29,637 --> 00:04:32,373 OH YES? THAT'S FUNNY, Because you stink of his sperm. 77 00:04:32,406 --> 00:04:34,375 - (laughs) - IS THIS HOW IT WORKS? 78 00:04:34,408 --> 00:04:36,043 OH YOU KNOW It's initially innocent, ISN'T IT? 79 00:04:36,076 --> 00:04:38,712 “Oh, I have to take a shower. LET'S SAVE WATER. IT'S TUESDAY. 80 00:04:38,746 --> 00:04:41,715 WHY DON’T YOU JUMP IN WITH ME?” I would like two additional bills 81 00:04:41,749 --> 00:04:43,917 AND $1000 RENT BACK, 82 00:04:43,951 --> 00:04:45,919 OR FAG CITY WILL CLOSED 83 00:04:45,953 --> 00:04:47,921 BY MAYOR McCHEESE OVER HERE. 84 00:04:47,955 --> 00:04:51,091 GOOD DAY! PAY! 85 00:04:51,124 --> 00:04:54,828 JAKE, YOU HAVE TO COME WITH $1200 86 00:04:54,862 --> 00:04:56,830 SEE YOU IN THE MORNING! 87 00:04:56,864 --> 00:04:59,900 Don't worry. I'll take care of it, man. 88 00:04:59,933 --> 00:05:01,835 JAKE, YOU DIDN'T A paycheck in six months. 89 00:05:01,869 --> 00:05:03,804 How do you get up? WITH $1200 TOMORROW TOMORROW, JAKE? 90 00:05:03,837 --> 00:05:07,107 Okay, I expect it NOW ONE RESIDUAL CHECK EVERY DAY FROM THE UNDERWEAR ADVERTISING. 91 00:05:07,140 --> 00:05:09,677 JAKE, THE LAST TIME A RESIDUAL CHECK FOR THIS 92 00:05:09,710 --> 00:05:11,679 IT WAS $20. 93 00:05:11,712 --> 00:05:14,648 And you spent it on it “MILF MONTHLY” SUBSCRIPTION. 94 00:05:14,682 --> 00:05:16,350 Yes, that wasn't very Good investment, right? 95 00:05:16,384 --> 00:05:18,352 YES, JAKE, This is a bad investment. 96 00:05:18,386 --> 00:05:19,687 THIS IS VERY VERY BAD INVESTMENT. 97 00:05:19,720 --> 00:05:20,921 WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO SAY, RON? 98 00:05:20,954 --> 00:05:22,356 What I'm trying to say is get a job. 99 00:05:22,390 --> 00:05:24,692 OK? Get a job, JAKE. 100 00:05:24,725 --> 00:05:27,795 EVERYTHING YOU DO IS Bring hot women home 101 00:05:27,828 --> 00:05:29,497 AND SLEEP WITH THEM IN MY BED. 102 00:05:29,530 --> 00:05:32,400 AND I NEED TO SLEEP ON THE COUCH IN MY OWN HOUSE. 103 00:05:32,433 --> 00:05:34,735 YOU DON'T PAY RENT. YOU DON'T PAY FOR FOOD. 104 00:05:34,768 --> 00:05:36,904 - THEY DO NOTHING. And I'm tired of it. - OKAY. 105 00:05:36,937 --> 00:05:39,473 I can't live like this anymore. I just can't afford it anymore. 106 00:05:39,507 --> 00:05:41,509 I refuse to afford it. I can't afford it. 107 00:05:41,542 --> 00:05:43,110 I CANNOT SUPPORT YOU. 108 00:05:43,143 --> 00:05:46,880 RONALD, calm down. IT'S NOT THAT SIMPLE For me too, okay? 109 00:05:46,914 --> 00:05:49,883 It's not like I'm on vacation. I'm out there every day I'm trying to make a living. 110 00:05:49,917 --> 00:05:51,885 Things will happen CHANGE, OKAY? 111 00:05:51,919 --> 00:05:53,987 I really try hard. I'll make sure this works. 112 00:05:54,021 --> 00:05:56,724 I'll bring you the money, I SWEAR TO GOD. I SWEAR. 113 00:05:56,757 --> 00:05:59,693 I have a casting IN A FEW HOURS. It's for this modeling gig. 114 00:05:59,727 --> 00:06:01,429 I think I have Good try, man. 115 00:06:01,462 --> 00:06:03,163 I HAVE ONE OF THESE REALLY GOOD FEELINGS I USUALLY GET... 116 00:06:03,196 --> 00:06:05,866 A REALLY GOOD FEELING. Don't worry. 117 00:06:05,899 --> 00:06:08,669 Well, that's wonderful. 'Cause every time I go out, 118 00:06:08,702 --> 00:06:10,704 I HAVE A REALLY GOOD FEELING ABOUT THIS, 119 00:06:10,738 --> 00:06:12,706 And that never seems to be the case TRAIN FOR ME. 120 00:06:12,740 --> 00:06:16,143 OKAY, well, there it is YOU AND I ARE DIFFERENT, MY FRIEND, 121 00:06:16,176 --> 00:06:19,413 BECAUSE I HAVE A SECRET WEAPON-- A VERY SECRET WEAPON 122 00:06:19,447 --> 00:06:21,415 WHAT WILL HELP MY SUCCESS. 123 00:06:21,449 --> 00:06:25,519 I HAVE ME A brand new stage name. 124 00:06:25,553 --> 00:06:27,755 - DO YOU WANT TO HEAR IT? - YES. 125 00:06:27,788 --> 00:06:30,591 HELLO. I'm GERARD COLBECK. 126 00:06:34,127 --> 00:06:36,930 THIS IS IT. It's sick, right? 127 00:06:36,964 --> 00:06:39,199 IF YOU DO GAY PORN. 128 00:06:39,232 --> 00:06:41,201 Look, I'll take care of it ABOUT THAT, OKAY, MAN? 129 00:06:41,234 --> 00:06:43,203 I PROMISE THAT. I WILL FIND IT The money somehow. 130 00:06:43,236 --> 00:06:45,439 I'll do it right, I SWEAR. 131 00:06:45,473 --> 00:06:48,008 OK? 132 00:06:48,041 --> 00:06:50,578 OK? IN ORDER. 133 00:06:50,611 --> 00:06:52,580 - WISH ME LUCK. I HAVE TO GO. - GOOD LUCK. 134 00:06:52,613 --> 00:06:56,083 WAIT, WHAT SHOULD I DO? IN BED WITH THIS GIRL? 135 00:06:58,251 --> 00:07:00,854 I DON'T KNOW. Make her breakfast. 136 00:07:00,888 --> 00:07:03,223 Well, what's her name? 137 00:07:03,256 --> 00:07:06,159 Um, I don't know. 138 00:07:06,193 --> 00:07:08,228 BUT SHE HAS A FETISH FOR WHIPPED CREAM. 139 00:07:08,261 --> 00:07:09,697 IF WE HAVE ANYTHING LEFT, USE IT. 140 00:07:09,730 --> 00:07:11,899 REESE'S PIECES. 141 00:07:17,638 --> 00:07:20,808 Um, excuse me, miss? 142 00:07:20,841 --> 00:07:22,910 HELLO. 143 00:07:22,943 --> 00:07:24,912 GERARD COBALT? 144 00:07:24,945 --> 00:07:27,648 - COBALT? COLBECK? - COLBECK. 145 00:07:27,681 --> 00:07:31,519 We're shooting a campaign For BRIONI, is everything clear? 146 00:07:31,552 --> 00:07:33,521 And honestly I mean, LOOK AT YOU, 147 00:07:33,554 --> 00:07:35,556 That's kind of how it is WHAT WE ARE LOOKING FOR. 148 00:07:35,589 --> 00:07:38,892 I mean, you... THAT IS OUR CUSTOMER MR HARTLEY 149 00:07:38,926 --> 00:07:42,095 AND MISS BARBRA SKYPES. SHE IS THE OWNER OF THE P.R. COMPANY 150 00:07:42,129 --> 00:07:43,831 START THE CAMPAIGN FOR MR HARTLEY. 151 00:07:43,864 --> 00:07:45,833 - HELLO. - HOW ARE YOU DOING? 152 00:07:45,866 --> 00:07:47,935 FIRST LET'S GET SIMPLE Take a few shots, okay? 153 00:07:47,968 --> 00:07:50,070 WE WILL JUST SEE HOW YOU LOOK ON CAMERA 154 00:07:50,103 --> 00:07:51,572 WITH OUR BEAUTIFUL GIADA HERE. 155 00:07:51,605 --> 00:07:53,073 - YES YES? -HELLO, GIADA. ENJOYMENT. 156 00:07:53,106 --> 00:07:55,142 Photographer: MM-HMM. 157 00:07:55,175 --> 00:07:57,545 - JUST JUST INTRODUCE IT? - SIMPLE, YES, snuggle up right now. 158 00:07:57,578 --> 00:08:00,213 SHE WILL NOT BITE. (giggles) 159 00:08:02,249 --> 00:08:04,184 Snuggle right into it. 160 00:08:06,554 --> 00:08:09,523 YES YES. UH... 161 00:08:25,639 --> 00:08:27,575 Um, I don't know-- 162 00:08:27,608 --> 00:08:29,877 UH... 163 00:08:32,012 --> 00:08:33,981 UH... 164 00:08:34,014 --> 00:08:35,683 BRIONI. 165 00:08:35,716 --> 00:08:37,284 R-R-R-R. 166 00:08:37,317 --> 00:08:39,286 Sophisticated chic, yes? 167 00:08:39,319 --> 00:08:41,555 Let's just try it SOME OF THESE LOOKS-- LOTS OF EYES. 168 00:08:41,589 --> 00:08:43,957 YES YES YES? OK. 169 00:08:43,991 --> 00:08:45,959 All right, yes. LIVING EYES. 170 00:08:45,993 --> 00:08:47,961 YOU ARE ALIVE. 171 00:08:47,995 --> 00:08:49,930 YES YES. 172 00:08:52,600 --> 00:08:55,569 LET'S-- 173 00:08:55,603 --> 00:08:57,571 Let's just try it DO NOTHING 174 00:08:57,605 --> 00:08:59,573 WITH YOUR-- WITH YOURSELF. 175 00:08:59,607 --> 00:09:02,576 - Let's just try the void AND EMOTIONLESS. - RIGHT. 176 00:09:02,610 --> 00:09:05,679 Just stop it EVERYTHING. OK. 177 00:09:05,713 --> 00:09:07,547 YES YES. 178 00:09:12,653 --> 00:09:14,855 GOT IT. I think we have that. 179 00:09:14,888 --> 00:09:17,357 We really got it. I think that's fantastic. OK. 180 00:09:17,390 --> 00:09:18,759 REALLY? 181 00:09:18,792 --> 00:09:20,761 VERY VERY EMPTY. 182 00:09:20,794 --> 00:09:23,363 I'm not sure if I brought it with me MY BEST GAME TO LAST. 183 00:09:23,396 --> 00:09:24,998 WE HAVE IT. THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 184 00:09:25,032 --> 00:09:27,367 YES IT WAS Actually pretty good. IT WAS PRETTY GOOD. 185 00:09:27,400 --> 00:09:31,605 I also brought a headshot FOR YOU, 186 00:09:31,639 --> 00:09:33,607 If you'll pardon the pun. 187 00:09:33,641 --> 00:09:35,342 GET IT? HEADSHOT? 188 00:09:35,375 --> 00:09:38,712 YES, A HEADSHOT. 189 00:09:38,746 --> 00:09:40,280 (laughs) 190 00:09:40,313 --> 00:09:43,150 - WE WILL STAY IN CONTACT. - OR NOT. 191 00:09:43,183 --> 00:09:45,318 - JUST LIKE THAT. - OKAY. 192 00:09:49,422 --> 00:09:51,892 GOOD GOOD. 193 00:09:51,925 --> 00:09:54,728 -Ronnie: OH JAKEY. - HEY DUDE. 194 00:09:54,762 --> 00:09:56,730 - Didn't go very well, did it? - I'M SORRY. 195 00:09:56,764 --> 00:09:58,932 I'm sorry, man. Didn't go well at all. 196 00:09:58,966 --> 00:10:01,034 I didn't have the right Look what they wanted. 197 00:10:01,068 --> 00:10:03,403 It's so stupid, man. THAT'S WHAT THEY WERE FOR CENTRAL AMERICA THING. 198 00:10:03,436 --> 00:10:05,372 - I don't understand it myself. - THAT'S SOMETHING STUPID. THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 199 00:10:05,405 --> 00:10:07,975 -GRACIAS, JORGE. - JORGE, could you please GO BACK? 200 00:10:08,008 --> 00:10:11,144 I asked you to get it SOME OLIVES FROM THE BACK. Can you please do that? 201 00:10:11,178 --> 00:10:14,181 JORGE. Damn, JORGE. 202 00:10:14,214 --> 00:10:17,284 I'M SORRY. GO. Go back there. 203 00:10:17,317 --> 00:10:19,787 HEY, GET IN THE DAMN KITCHEN. 204 00:10:23,791 --> 00:10:25,993 - What's the deal for this guy? - I don't even think HE SPEAKS ENGLISH. 205 00:10:26,026 --> 00:10:27,728 I DON'T KNOW IF HE UNDERSTANDS WHAT I SAY. 206 00:10:27,761 --> 00:10:30,698 All right, I have to Make sure it's not him He cuts himself again. 207 00:10:30,731 --> 00:10:33,100 - WOULD YOU LOOK UP IN THE BAR? - YES YES YES. 208 00:10:35,402 --> 00:10:37,738 - BABY, take a seat. - IN ORDER. 209 00:10:37,771 --> 00:10:39,740 (sighs) 210 00:10:39,773 --> 00:10:41,742 HEY YO. 211 00:10:41,775 --> 00:10:44,411 HEY YO. CAN I HELP YOU? 212 00:10:44,444 --> 00:10:46,714 - Do you work here, buddy? - ACTUALLY I DO. WHAT CAN I GET YOU? 213 00:10:46,747 --> 00:10:50,684 TWO VODKA TONICS, DOUBLE. WE'RE GOING CRAZY TONIGHT, BABY. 214 00:10:50,718 --> 00:10:52,219 - YES. - YES. 215 00:10:52,252 --> 00:10:54,221 - DOUBLE? GO CRAZY EH, BIG MAN? - YES. 216 00:10:54,254 --> 00:10:57,257 - TWO VODKA TONICS Comes straight up. - WE'RE GOING CRAZY. 217 00:10:57,290 --> 00:10:59,259 (both laugh) 218 00:10:59,292 --> 00:11:01,361 GO CRAZY. Sorry, I forgot your name. 219 00:11:01,394 --> 00:11:04,364 - I didn't tell you. - OH, OKAY. 220 00:11:05,833 --> 00:11:08,268 TWO VODKA TONICS. 221 00:11:09,870 --> 00:11:13,340 - You're an air sign, right? - YES. HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT? 222 00:11:13,373 --> 00:11:17,144 I WILL SAY YOU ARE AN AQUARIUS. 223 00:11:17,177 --> 00:11:19,346 YES. THIS IS CRAZY. 224 00:11:19,379 --> 00:11:21,281 OH MY GOD, you are like that PSYCHICAL OR SOMETHING? 225 00:11:21,314 --> 00:11:22,649 - HEY BUDDY, HEY BUDDY. - Wait a minute, buddy. 226 00:11:22,682 --> 00:11:25,118 - JUST DO IT The drinks, all right? - ONE SECOND, BUDDY, ONE SECOND. 227 00:11:25,152 --> 00:11:28,221 - MY NAME IS CINDI. -CINDI? HMM. 228 00:11:28,255 --> 00:11:32,192 CINDI, you don't hit me AS A TYPE OF VODKA TONIC FROM GAL. 229 00:11:32,225 --> 00:11:34,762 I will continue AND SAY 230 00:11:34,795 --> 00:11:37,464 YOUR FAVORITE DRINK IS 231 00:11:37,497 --> 00:11:39,466 A STRAWBERRY MOJITO. 232 00:11:39,499 --> 00:11:43,236 OH MY GOD THAT IS MY FUCKING FAVORITE. 233 00:11:43,270 --> 00:11:46,740 (both laugh) 234 00:11:46,774 --> 00:11:50,878 YES, I THINK WHAT WE SHOULD DO IS 235 00:11:50,911 --> 00:11:53,346 Once you're done WITH FROM DOUCHE HERE, YOU AND I COME TOGETHER 236 00:11:53,380 --> 00:11:55,482 - AND grab this STRAWBERRY MOJITO. - Wow, what did you just say? 237 00:11:55,515 --> 00:11:58,385 - I said as soon as you're done-- - HEY COME HERE. 238 00:11:58,418 --> 00:12:00,087 - COME HERE. COME HERE. - WHAT? 239 00:12:00,120 --> 00:12:02,756 -OH! - I WILL CUT YOU. 240 00:12:02,790 --> 00:12:05,325 - GOOD GOOD. ENOUGH WITH THE “ROID RAGE”. - Get a tan, all right? 241 00:12:05,358 --> 00:12:07,761 - SHE ALREADY HAS THIS. - HEY, ENOUGH. 242 00:12:07,795 --> 00:12:11,231 - SHE DON'T NEED THAT. - ENOUGH WITH THE 'ROID RAGE' ALREADY. TAKE YOUR DRINK. 243 00:12:11,264 --> 00:12:12,532 - Eat a sandwich, buddy. - IT'S OKAY. 244 00:12:12,565 --> 00:12:14,768 - WHAT ABOUT IT? - Ronnie: I'm sorry. 245 00:12:14,802 --> 00:12:16,770 - Cindi: ENOUGH. -TAKE A SEAT, BABY. 246 00:12:16,804 --> 00:12:19,439 - YOU ARE OUT OF CONTROL. - WHY YOU NEED TO FLIRT WITH EVERYONE, EH? 247 00:12:19,472 --> 00:12:22,542 I'll leave you alone for two minutes, You start fights IN MY BAR. 248 00:12:22,575 --> 00:12:25,112 - I BUILT THIS FOR YOU. IT'S YOURS. IT'S MY GIFT. - GOOD GOOD. 249 00:12:25,145 --> 00:12:27,447 WHY YOU NEED TO WATCH IT-- Pale boy over there? 250 00:12:27,480 --> 00:12:30,884 HAVE YOU DONE YOURS? ASTROLOGY SPELLS? 251 00:12:30,918 --> 00:12:32,419 - I ACTUALLY DID IT. - YES, DID IT WORK? 252 00:12:32,452 --> 00:12:34,421 Apparently it is ONE IN FOUR CHANCES, 253 00:12:34,454 --> 00:12:37,424 AND THE REST IS JUST LUCK, So, I don't know, the best chances I will ever get. 254 00:12:37,457 --> 00:12:40,527 - Hello JAKE. -JESUS. WHAT ARE YOU Are you doing here? 255 00:12:40,560 --> 00:12:42,429 I CAME TO SEE YOU. HELLO. 256 00:12:42,462 --> 00:12:44,097 YES, WE SHOULD SET A BELL AROUND YOUR NECK. 257 00:12:44,131 --> 00:12:46,299 How did your audition go? 258 00:12:46,333 --> 00:12:48,235 Obviously he isn't CENTRAL AMERICA ENOUGH. 259 00:12:48,268 --> 00:12:51,104 - He cried in his beer FOR ABOUT 20 MINUTES. - OH I'M SORRY. 260 00:12:51,138 --> 00:12:54,041 Maybe the mouse can help YOU FEEL BETTER. (laughs) 261 00:12:54,074 --> 00:12:56,944 MAYBE THE MOUSE CAN KEEP YOUR HANDS TO YOURSELF. 262 00:12:56,977 --> 00:12:58,846 WAIT A MOMENT. WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU Do you even do it here? 263 00:12:58,879 --> 00:13:00,413 THEY SHOULD NOT BE BE AT WORK? 264 00:13:00,447 --> 00:13:02,415 WELL YES, 265 00:13:02,449 --> 00:13:04,417 It has become a little firmer AT THE COMPANY 266 00:13:04,451 --> 00:13:05,819 AND I HAD SEX WITH A CUSTOMER. 267 00:13:05,853 --> 00:13:07,821 I'M SORRY. Did you have sex with your customer? 268 00:13:07,855 --> 00:13:09,256 - So you were fired? - SHOCKING. 269 00:13:09,289 --> 00:13:11,458 -WOW. - MY BOSS FOUND OUT ABOUT IT, 270 00:13:11,491 --> 00:13:13,927 - SO I had sex with him too. - PRETTY. 271 00:13:13,961 --> 00:13:16,864 - AND SO THEN We were both fired. - THAT'S INTERESTING. 272 00:13:16,897 --> 00:13:18,866 THIS IS GREAT. THEN THERE ARE TWO OF US 273 00:13:18,899 --> 00:13:22,102 WHO DON'T HAVE JOBS OR ANY MONEY. 274 00:13:22,135 --> 00:13:24,872 (Italian accent) This is one of my favorites PLACES IN THE CITY. 275 00:13:24,905 --> 00:13:26,506 I'LL GET YOU THE CREAM-FILLED SKIN ROLLER. 276 00:13:26,539 --> 00:13:28,508 - LET'S GO. - OOH, LOVELY. 277 00:13:28,541 --> 00:13:31,078 - What a bottom feeder. - LET'S SIT, NO? 278 00:13:31,111 --> 00:13:33,413 It's for rent. 279 00:13:33,446 --> 00:13:34,781 WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? What do you mean it's for rent? 280 00:13:34,814 --> 00:13:38,018 - YES, LIKE AN ESCORT. - THAT DOES NOT EXIST AS A MALE ESCORT. 281 00:13:38,051 --> 00:13:40,854 - OH, YOU ARE SO NAIVE. - This guy is a prostitute? 282 00:13:40,888 --> 00:13:42,856 He's a pretty hot item IN THE COUGAR WORLD. 283 00:13:42,890 --> 00:13:45,893 FIVE YEARS YOUNGER, I would suck your face off RIGHT HERE. 284 00:13:45,926 --> 00:13:47,260 - WAITER! - YOU SHOULD GO Pounce on her, 285 00:13:47,294 --> 00:13:49,462 BECAUSE COMPARED TO HIS LITTLE FAUCET, 286 00:13:49,496 --> 00:13:51,398 YOURS IS A PEACE FIRE HOSE. 287 00:13:51,431 --> 00:13:53,266 She would turn around. 288 00:13:53,300 --> 00:13:56,870 - EVERYONE KNOWS JAKE HAS A HUGE COCK. - YES, I'M JUST SAYING-- 289 00:13:56,904 --> 00:13:58,505 WAITER, TWO MARTINIS, PLEASE. 290 00:13:58,538 --> 00:14:00,040 CHA CHA CHA. 291 00:14:00,073 --> 00:14:02,342 WOMEN WOULD PAY Your muscle. 292 00:14:02,375 --> 00:14:04,511 Guys, enough is enough. 293 00:14:04,544 --> 00:14:05,645 I MEAN, COME ON. 294 00:14:05,678 --> 00:14:07,647 YES, THAT'S EXACT WHAT YOU NEED. 295 00:14:07,680 --> 00:14:09,950 HEY, bartender, can we come? A ROUND OF DRINKS? 296 00:14:09,983 --> 00:14:11,952 Look, now it's Jorge's Pouring drinks. 297 00:14:11,985 --> 00:14:13,486 WHOO! ONE FOR YOU, ONE FOR YOU... 298 00:14:13,520 --> 00:14:16,123 - YOU ARE NOT QUALIFIED. - Jake: JORGE, YOU CAN Give me a vodka? 299 00:14:16,156 --> 00:14:17,891 TWO FOR YOU AND FOR YOU. TO LOOK GOOD. 300 00:14:17,925 --> 00:14:19,893 JORGE, get me another one BEER TOO, right? 301 00:14:19,927 --> 00:14:22,930 * PARTY PARTY 302 00:14:22,963 --> 00:14:25,065 * THIS GIRL I really got it... * 303 00:14:25,098 --> 00:14:28,368 - JORGE. - UH. 304 00:14:28,401 --> 00:14:30,971 HE'S JUST DOING IT NOW. 305 00:14:31,004 --> 00:14:32,305 MORE. LIGHT UP. 306 00:14:32,339 --> 00:14:34,374 (Happy song continues) 307 00:14:53,226 --> 00:14:55,228 WHOO! 308 00:15:00,600 --> 00:15:02,635 I LOVE YOU. 309 00:15:15,715 --> 00:15:19,252 OH GOD. 310 00:15:19,286 --> 00:15:21,254 GOOD MORNING SUNSHINE. 311 00:15:21,288 --> 00:15:23,256 WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? 312 00:15:23,290 --> 00:15:25,525 I slept over there, silly. 313 00:15:25,558 --> 00:15:27,927 OH GOD. DO WE HAVE SEX? 314 00:15:31,999 --> 00:15:35,668 It feels like we've had sex. 315 00:15:35,702 --> 00:15:37,670 Don't worry, JAKEY. 316 00:15:37,704 --> 00:15:40,740 IS IMPORTANT WE ALL HAVE FUN. 317 00:15:40,773 --> 00:15:45,412 WHAT-- WHAT DOES THAT MEAN EXACTLY meant? 318 00:15:45,445 --> 00:15:48,281 It means what it means. 319 00:15:48,315 --> 00:15:50,483 - Do you like my pajamas? - (door opens) 320 00:15:50,517 --> 00:15:53,286 Have you had sex? 321 00:15:53,320 --> 00:15:56,123 I DON'T KNOW. She won't tell me. 322 00:15:56,156 --> 00:15:59,126 Well, guess what, JAKE. It's already early tomorrow. 323 00:15:59,159 --> 00:16:02,029 YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEAN? STU is on its way here. 324 00:16:02,062 --> 00:16:03,630 - HAVE YOU MADE COFFEE? - YES, THERE IS COFFEE OUT THERE. 325 00:16:03,663 --> 00:16:06,633 - The landlord comes over. WHAT DO WE DO NOW? - IN ORDER. 326 00:16:06,666 --> 00:16:08,701 -SHH. - SHH-- MONEY COMES OUT FROM YOUR MOUTH? 327 00:16:08,735 --> 00:16:10,070 Where's the money, JAKE? 328 00:16:10,103 --> 00:16:12,772 COFFEE COFFEE COFFEE. 329 00:16:12,805 --> 00:16:15,275 What are we going to do, guys? 330 00:16:15,308 --> 00:16:18,578 - ABOUT WHAT? - THE MONEY, MOUSE, THE MONEY. 331 00:16:18,611 --> 00:16:20,547 - He owes me money. - I think, okay? 332 00:16:20,580 --> 00:16:23,650 - MY LANDLORD IS COMING In about 20 minutes. - Seriously, calm down. 333 00:16:23,683 --> 00:16:25,652 GOD. 334 00:16:25,685 --> 00:16:27,454 Okay, JAKE, 335 00:16:27,487 --> 00:16:30,157 No insult or anything, BUT THE ONLY MODELING YOU HAVE EVER DONE THIS 336 00:16:30,190 --> 00:16:32,792 IT'S ON THIS WALL Right here, right? 337 00:16:32,825 --> 00:16:35,495 - That's a good shot, right? - You can't really see it YOUR FACE, CAN YOU? 338 00:16:35,528 --> 00:16:39,499 I think it probably is TIME FOR YOU TO MOVE ON, 339 00:16:39,532 --> 00:16:42,035 YOU KNOW, DO OTHER THINGS WITH YOUR LIFE, 340 00:16:42,069 --> 00:16:44,371 Leave the modeling IN THE PAST. 341 00:16:44,404 --> 00:16:46,373 WHAT DO YOU SAY I'm a bad model? 342 00:16:46,406 --> 00:16:48,475 (laughs) 343 00:16:48,508 --> 00:16:50,377 JAKE, YOU ARE A PEACEFUL TERRIBLE MODEL. 344 00:16:50,410 --> 00:16:51,611 Ouch, RONNIE. 345 00:16:51,644 --> 00:16:54,681 I'm sorry. SOMEONE HAD TO SAY IT. 346 00:16:54,714 --> 00:16:56,416 YOU ARE A BAD-- You're not a good model. 347 00:16:56,449 --> 00:16:59,186 YOU DIDN'T To be so hard, man, I mean, you know? 348 00:16:59,219 --> 00:17:02,389 OKAY, I'M SORRY. I didn't want to be harsh. 349 00:17:02,422 --> 00:17:05,058 IT'S JUST I HAVE A HARD TIME 350 00:17:05,092 --> 00:17:07,060 I'm paying off my student loans FROM MY USELESS M.B.A. 351 00:17:07,094 --> 00:17:08,728 AND SUPPORTS YOU AT THE SAME TIME. 352 00:17:08,761 --> 00:17:10,430 And maybe you should too GO TO THE WORLD, 353 00:17:10,463 --> 00:17:12,765 Pack up your things, GET A JOB 354 00:17:12,799 --> 00:17:15,068 AND DO SOMETHING WITH YOUR LIFE. 355 00:17:15,102 --> 00:17:17,170 MOUSE, YOU THINK I'm a good model, right? 356 00:17:17,204 --> 00:17:19,172 OH YES YES. 357 00:17:19,206 --> 00:17:22,342 THE DIP Between your butt cheeks AND THE BACK OF YOUR THIGH, 358 00:17:22,375 --> 00:17:24,811 ESPECIALLY THE RIGHT SIDE-- HELLO. 359 00:17:24,844 --> 00:17:26,846 All right, whatever. THE POINT IS 360 00:17:26,879 --> 00:17:29,782 This is pretty serious SITUATION, OK? WE HAVE TO FIND OUT SOMETHING. 361 00:17:29,816 --> 00:17:31,851 YES, JAKE, YES. 362 00:17:31,884 --> 00:17:35,255 MAYBE YOU SHOULD CHECK YOUR SKILLS 363 00:17:35,288 --> 00:17:37,524 AND GET A JOB You're really good at that. 364 00:17:37,557 --> 00:17:39,726 THIS IS ACTUAL NOT A BAD IDEA. 365 00:17:39,759 --> 00:17:42,195 All clear, whatever is SOME SKILLS I HAVE 366 00:17:42,229 --> 00:17:43,830 - THINGS I'M GOOD AT? - PICK UP WOMEN. 367 00:17:43,863 --> 00:17:45,865 DO WOMEN 368 00:17:45,898 --> 00:17:48,835 NOT THAT I WOULD KNOW FROM CURRENT EXPERIENCE. 369 00:17:48,868 --> 00:17:51,104 Okay, what else? 370 00:17:51,138 --> 00:17:53,106 I think that's it. I think that could be it. 371 00:17:53,140 --> 00:17:54,474 -JAKE. - WHAT? 372 00:17:54,507 --> 00:17:56,109 THIS COUGAR FROM LAST NIGHT. 373 00:17:56,143 --> 00:17:57,777 OH, MAN, I didn't sleep WITH HER, DID I? 374 00:17:57,810 --> 00:17:59,746 NO NO, THE BOY'S TOY THAT SHE WAS WITH. 375 00:17:59,779 --> 00:18:01,748 I definitely didn't do that Sleep with this guy. I would remember that. 376 00:18:01,781 --> 00:18:03,816 NO, I'M NOT SAYING THAT Although that would be hot. 377 00:18:03,850 --> 00:18:06,219 NO, DO YOU REMEMBER HIM? 378 00:18:06,253 --> 00:18:08,721 - YES, VAG. - WELL, I THINK 379 00:18:08,755 --> 00:18:11,291 He makes a pretty good living Taking out lonely babes. 380 00:18:11,324 --> 00:18:13,760 I bet he does. 381 00:18:13,793 --> 00:18:16,196 AND YOU PROBABLY COULD DO THE SAME. 382 00:18:16,229 --> 00:18:19,232 OH, NO, THAT IS A terrible idea. 383 00:18:20,833 --> 00:18:22,869 I could fight for money. 384 00:18:24,904 --> 00:18:27,774 - EVERYONE MUST EARN A LIVING. - THAT'S DISGUSTING. 385 00:18:27,807 --> 00:18:29,209 OH, NO, I think I COULD DO THAT. 386 00:18:29,242 --> 00:18:31,778 - I COULD BE YOUR MANAGER. - OH DEAR GOD. 387 00:18:31,811 --> 00:18:33,913 WAIT A MOMENT. You mean pimp. YOU WANT TO BE MY PIMMER. 388 00:18:33,946 --> 00:18:37,417 MANAGER. MANAGER SOUNDS BETTER ON A BUSINESS CARD. 389 00:18:37,450 --> 00:18:39,852 YES, YOU KNOW WITH MY P.R. SKILLS 390 00:18:39,886 --> 00:18:42,155 AND MY OLD JOB ALONE-- I know so many coughs 391 00:18:42,189 --> 00:18:44,457 I would like to take that with me Here's little Jakey, 392 00:18:44,491 --> 00:18:47,494 OR SHOULD I SAY BIG JAKEY? 393 00:18:47,527 --> 00:18:49,729 OH. OK. 394 00:18:49,762 --> 00:18:51,731 OK, JUST SAY I'LL DO THIS-- 395 00:18:51,764 --> 00:18:55,268 I don't want to sleep WITH ALL WOMEN BECAUSE I would feel a little dirty. 396 00:18:55,302 --> 00:18:57,270 OH COME ON, You were dirtier. 397 00:18:57,304 --> 00:18:59,306 - SHOULD I SLEEP? WITH ALL WOMEN? - NOT IF YOU DON'T WANT IT. 398 00:18:59,339 --> 00:19:01,908 OH, dude, I can go FROM GERARD – MY ARTIST NAME. 399 00:19:01,941 --> 00:19:04,411 -GERARD. - YES, I LIKE IT-- GERARD. 400 00:19:04,444 --> 00:19:07,680 OK. WE COULD DO SOMETHING REAL MONEY DISCOUNT, COULDN’T WE? 401 00:19:07,714 --> 00:19:09,949 OH, COMPLETELY. I mean, definitely. 402 00:19:09,982 --> 00:19:13,253 IN A FEW WEEKS We'll roll in it. 403 00:19:13,286 --> 00:19:15,255 OF COURSE IN THE BEGINNING 404 00:19:15,288 --> 00:19:16,956 THERE WILL BE SOMETHING START-UP COSTS. 405 00:19:16,989 --> 00:19:18,858 HOW MUCH MONEY DID YOU DO LAST NIGHT? 406 00:19:18,891 --> 00:19:20,860 HUH-UH. HUH-UH. 407 00:19:20,893 --> 00:19:24,931 - RONNIE MONEY, WE NEED YOU. - NO NO. 408 00:19:24,964 --> 00:19:28,235 - WE NEED IT. OH, PLEASE COME. - NO NO. 409 00:19:28,268 --> 00:19:31,538 He'll have it in no time THE REPAYMENT AND THE RENT-- IN A WEEK, I PROMISE. 410 00:19:31,571 --> 00:19:33,973 AND I PROMISE IF YOU GIVE ME THIS CASH 411 00:19:34,006 --> 00:19:37,377 PLUS TWO WEEKS RENT, I will pay you back in full. 412 00:19:37,410 --> 00:19:41,314 NOTHING TO LOSE AND WIN EVERYTHING. 413 00:19:41,348 --> 00:19:43,716 LIGHT UP. YOU COULD EVEN GET A FRIEND. 414 00:19:43,750 --> 00:19:45,885 - GOOD GOOD. - (squeals) 415 00:19:45,918 --> 00:19:47,887 RONNIE MONEY, HONEY, 416 00:19:47,920 --> 00:19:49,889 Honey, we'll do it MAKE SOME MONEY. 417 00:19:49,922 --> 00:19:52,559 I am the pimp. I am the pimp. Who is the pimp now? 418 00:19:52,592 --> 00:19:54,961 Look, first things first. 419 00:19:54,994 --> 00:19:57,964 WHEN YOU GO For a cougar you will I have to go one step further, 420 00:19:57,997 --> 00:19:59,966 - Get some style. - All right, whatever. 421 00:19:59,999 --> 00:20:02,769 OH WAIT, I THINK THIS IS IT. YES, IT IS. 422 00:20:02,802 --> 00:20:05,805 Okay, he's killing me A huge favor, so come on. 423 00:20:05,838 --> 00:20:07,974 - HELLO. - HELLO. 424 00:20:08,007 --> 00:20:10,377 - DOMINIC WAR WAITING FOR YOU. - HEY, I'm JAKE. 425 00:20:10,410 --> 00:20:12,379 - Um, YOU CAN RISE. - OF COURSE, YES. 426 00:20:12,412 --> 00:20:14,381 -DOMINIC. - HELLO. 427 00:20:14,414 --> 00:20:17,350 - This is JAKE. - YES, YOU ALREADY ARE JUMP UP THERE, ARE YOU? 428 00:20:17,384 --> 00:20:19,352 - HEY HOW ARE YOU? - HOW ARE YOU DOING? 429 00:20:19,386 --> 00:20:22,255 - GOOD, THANKS. GREAT. - GOOD GOOD GOOD. 430 00:20:22,289 --> 00:20:24,957 OOH, SOMEONE DONE THE RIGHT CAREER CHOICE. 431 00:20:24,991 --> 00:20:26,926 (Mouse and Dominic laugh) 432 00:20:26,959 --> 00:20:29,529 I DIDN'T MY BREAKFAST TODAY, So you'd better be careful. 433 00:20:29,562 --> 00:20:32,299 I mean, BOING! HELLO. 434 00:20:32,332 --> 00:20:35,368 - JUST LET ME CHECK THIS INSIDE SEAM RIGHT HERE. - AGE. 435 00:20:35,402 --> 00:20:38,505 I don't want you to burst NOW GET OUT OF THESE PANTS, WOULD WE? 436 00:20:38,538 --> 00:20:41,040 -WOW. - THANK YOU VERY MUCH For doing this. 437 00:20:41,073 --> 00:20:43,876 - YOU ARE SUCH A TREASURE. - Both: MWAH! 438 00:20:43,910 --> 00:20:46,813 Um, MOUSY, WHAT IS Is JORGE doing this here? 439 00:20:46,846 --> 00:20:48,781 - He's my intern. - He's your intern? 440 00:20:48,815 --> 00:20:51,351 Does Ronnie know about this? Because I'm sure he did BE VERY INTERESTED 441 00:20:51,384 --> 00:20:53,353 To find out it's you Poach his employees. 442 00:20:53,386 --> 00:20:56,055 Um, sweetie, you got this A BIG OLD PACKAGE, 443 00:20:56,088 --> 00:20:58,057 BUT YOU NEED A BODY. 444 00:20:58,090 --> 00:21:01,461 LISTEN, I CAN DO ANYTHING FOR YOU AND LET YOU LOOK EVERYTHING HOT AND SHIT. 445 00:21:01,494 --> 00:21:05,432 HOWEVER YOU NEED SOME GYM ACTION. 446 00:21:05,465 --> 00:21:08,935 Look at these flabby arms here, LITTLE CHICKEN ARMS. 447 00:21:08,968 --> 00:21:11,571 - (screams) - HE'S RIGHT, JAKE. 448 00:21:11,604 --> 00:21:14,574 Okay, you have that too Any suggestions for me? I live in Laurel Canyon. 449 00:21:14,607 --> 00:21:16,576 DO I HAVE ANY SUGGESTIONS? 450 00:21:16,609 --> 00:21:19,078 I'm too stubborn GAY 451 00:21:19,111 --> 00:21:21,080 LIVING IN WEST HOLLYWOOD. 452 00:21:21,113 --> 00:21:23,450 I AM THE PROUD FATHER 453 00:21:23,483 --> 00:21:26,653 A PURE BREED COCKAPOO-- LITTLE LILY ALLEN. 454 00:21:26,686 --> 00:21:29,656 - You would die for her. - AWW. 455 00:21:29,689 --> 00:21:30,923 Do I know a gym? 456 00:21:30,957 --> 00:21:34,594 Honey, a butch gym, LIKE YOU. 457 00:21:34,627 --> 00:21:37,964 And come back here AND I WILL MAKE YOU WORK On some glutes. 458 00:21:37,997 --> 00:21:39,766 So we all are Through here, right? 459 00:21:39,799 --> 00:21:41,768 GOOD STUFF. THANK YOU VERY MUCH. THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 460 00:21:41,801 --> 00:21:43,436 - Dominic: Keep it up. - I'll wait outside. 461 00:21:43,470 --> 00:21:45,438 OH GOD. 462 00:21:45,472 --> 00:21:47,440 OH DEAR GOD. 463 00:21:47,474 --> 00:21:50,377 This is your brilliant plan, P.R. GURU-- 464 00:21:50,410 --> 00:21:52,111 PLACE AN ADVERT IN A NEWSPAPER? 465 00:21:52,144 --> 00:21:54,547 Who actually reads? ANOTHER NEWSPAPER? 466 00:21:54,581 --> 00:21:57,550 I know women who read ARE A LITTLE OUT OF YOURSELF COMFORT ZONE, 467 00:21:57,584 --> 00:22:00,387 BUT I'LL TELL YOU THIS IS OUR PERFECT TARGET DEMO. 468 00:22:00,420 --> 00:22:02,389 - PLEASE I CAN READ. - YES. 469 00:22:02,422 --> 00:22:04,891 - Well, if you say so. - YES, THAT'S WHAT I SAY. 470 00:22:04,924 --> 00:22:06,893 - LOOK, JUST WATCH THIS ADVERT. - IN ORDER. 471 00:22:06,926 --> 00:22:09,662 BECAUSE I HAVE TO DO IT SOME CALLS TO GET YOU SOME STORES. 472 00:22:09,696 --> 00:22:12,665 GOOD GOOD. THANK YOU THANK YOU. 473 00:22:12,699 --> 00:22:15,935 - HELLO. - GOOD MORNING. I'm JEANIE. 474 00:22:15,968 --> 00:22:17,870 -HELLO, JEANIE. - WELCOME TO “THE HOLLYWOOD BEAT” 475 00:22:17,904 --> 00:22:20,139 THE BIGGEST AND LONGEST TRADE NEWSPAPER IN ALL LOS ANGELES, 476 00:22:20,172 --> 00:22:24,043 FOUNDED IN 1921, WINNER OF THE REEL TIME AWARD 2009 FOR ENTERTAINMENT JOURNALISM. 477 00:22:24,076 --> 00:22:25,512 HOW CAN I HELP YOU? 478 00:22:25,545 --> 00:22:27,547 THEY MAKE YOU REAL SAY A LOT, right? 479 00:22:27,580 --> 00:22:29,516 Yes, they do. 480 00:22:29,549 --> 00:22:31,551 MY NAME IS JAKE DYLAN. 481 00:22:31,584 --> 00:22:34,454 AND I'M SEARCHING TO PLACE AN ADVERT IN THE NEXT WEEKLY NEWSPAPER. 482 00:22:34,487 --> 00:22:36,589 OH GREAT. I WILL CALL OUR ADVERTISING MANAGER. 483 00:22:36,623 --> 00:22:37,824 PERFECT. THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 484 00:22:37,857 --> 00:22:39,826 ROBERT, I DID A LORD. DYLAN HERE 485 00:22:39,859 --> 00:22:41,861 THAT WOULD TO PLACE AN ADVERT. 486 00:22:45,932 --> 00:22:48,401 GREAT. He's coming out soon. 487 00:22:48,435 --> 00:22:51,103 - PERFECT. - CAN YOU DO ME A FAVOR? 488 00:22:51,137 --> 00:22:53,540 I WOULD LOVE To do you a favor. 489 00:22:53,573 --> 00:22:55,542 Be patient with him. 490 00:22:55,575 --> 00:22:58,511 He is very sensitive ABOUT HIS IMPAIRMENT. 491 00:22:58,545 --> 00:23:00,413 HIS IMPAIRMENT? 492 00:23:00,447 --> 00:23:03,416 YOU'LL SEE. JUST BE PATIENT. 493 00:23:03,450 --> 00:23:06,786 THANK YOU VERY MUCH. THANK YOU. 494 00:23:06,819 --> 00:23:10,523 - Actually, you do mind IF I ASK YOU A QUESTION? - SECURE. 495 00:23:10,557 --> 00:23:13,460 YOU APPEAR TO BE... IN EXCELLENT SHAPE. 496 00:23:13,493 --> 00:23:15,528 I WAS WONDERING If there was such a thing as a gym 497 00:23:15,562 --> 00:23:17,464 Or something like a gym AROUND HERE 498 00:23:17,497 --> 00:23:19,832 Where I might be, You know, gain weight A LITTLE. 499 00:23:19,866 --> 00:23:22,435 Yes, actually I'm going IN A GREAT YOGA STUDIO DOWN THE ROAD 500 00:23:22,469 --> 00:23:25,905 - CALLED BACKDOOR YOGA. - BACKDOOR YOGA? 501 00:23:25,938 --> 00:23:27,674 THEY HAVE GREAT THINGS BERRY PROTEIN SHAKES 502 00:23:27,707 --> 00:23:30,176 AND MY FRIEND NORAH IS THE TEACHER. SHE'S REALLY GOOD. 503 00:23:30,209 --> 00:23:32,044 YOUR MOTHER'S BEST FRIENDS WITH MY MOTHER. 504 00:23:32,078 --> 00:23:34,481 Yes, but it's great FOR YOUR CORE. 505 00:23:34,514 --> 00:23:38,117 CLEARLY – CLEARLY GREAT FOR YOUR CORE. 506 00:23:38,150 --> 00:23:40,219 It's not like a greasy, SWEATY, STINKY-- 507 00:23:40,252 --> 00:23:42,989 OH, NO, NO, JUST GOOD OLD AMERICAN YOGA. 508 00:23:43,022 --> 00:23:46,459 BUT THE CLASSES ARE MOSTLY GIRLS. 509 00:23:46,493 --> 00:23:48,628 - Well, that's fine. - EXCEPT ROBERT - MY BOSS. 510 00:23:48,661 --> 00:23:50,630 I TOOK ROBERT ONCE AND NOW HE KEEP WALKING. 511 00:23:50,663 --> 00:23:52,632 YOU LOVE IT Isn't it, ROBERT? 512 00:23:52,665 --> 00:23:53,733 HELLO. 513 00:23:53,766 --> 00:23:55,535 ROBERT, this is JAKE. 514 00:23:55,568 --> 00:23:57,537 (stutter) MM-- 515 00:23:57,570 --> 00:24:01,574 LORD. DYLAN. 516 00:24:01,608 --> 00:24:03,242 -YOU. -JAKE. 517 00:24:03,275 --> 00:24:05,177 HERE YOU WILL FIND ALL INFORMATION THIS IS WHAT YOU WILL NEED. 518 00:24:05,211 --> 00:24:08,114 And I hope we see each other AT YOGA. 519 00:24:08,147 --> 00:24:10,483 I HOPE TO SEE YOU EVEN IN YOGA. THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 520 00:24:10,517 --> 00:24:12,485 OH, DON'T WANT TO FORGET THAT. 521 00:24:12,519 --> 00:24:15,454 I can't forget my ad, can I? THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 522 00:24:23,830 --> 00:24:25,932 Jake: OKAY, IT'S JUST-- 523 00:24:25,965 --> 00:24:28,801 - (stuttering) - OH, I'M SORRY. 524 00:24:28,835 --> 00:24:32,505 DO YOU MIND? 525 00:24:34,006 --> 00:24:39,178 S-S-S-S-S-SO 526 00:24:39,211 --> 00:24:44,116 Would you like to place an ad? 527 00:24:44,150 --> 00:24:45,552 YES, I ACTUALLY WOULD. 528 00:24:45,585 --> 00:24:47,119 RIGHT HERE. 529 00:24:47,153 --> 00:24:48,220 “BOYS TOYS FOR RENT. 530 00:24:48,254 --> 00:24:50,256 Are you bored? LONELY NIGHTS ALONE? 531 00:24:50,289 --> 00:24:52,258 HAVE YOU HAD ENOUGH OF BE A THIRD WHEEL? 532 00:24:52,291 --> 00:24:54,260 YOU JUST WANT IT Have some fun? 533 00:24:54,293 --> 00:24:56,262 Well, if so, CALL THE BOY TOY! 534 00:24:56,295 --> 00:24:59,666 555-0188. SATISFACTION AND DISCRETION GUARANTEED.” 535 00:24:59,699 --> 00:25:02,535 BLAH BLAH BLAH. Let's go. 536 00:25:02,569 --> 00:25:05,605 THERE IS A PICTURE THAT ALSO FITS. 537 00:25:09,676 --> 00:25:11,243 NICE, right? 538 00:25:13,312 --> 00:25:18,217 UNDERSTOOD. 539 00:25:18,250 --> 00:25:22,254 I have to call it 540 00:25:22,288 --> 00:25:25,224 TO MY DESIGNER. 541 00:25:27,293 --> 00:25:30,096 S-S-STAN, 542 00:25:30,129 --> 00:25:32,198 It's M-ME. 543 00:25:32,231 --> 00:25:34,233 I have an ad. 544 00:25:34,266 --> 00:25:38,270 “BOY TOYS 545 00:25:38,304 --> 00:25:42,241 FOR RENT. 546 00:25:42,274 --> 00:25:45,678 BORED WITH 547 00:25:45,712 --> 00:25:47,747 LONELY N-N-N--" 548 00:25:47,780 --> 00:25:49,749 WHAT? 549 00:25:49,782 --> 00:25:53,586 Yes, I can start over. 550 00:25:53,620 --> 00:25:55,788 HEY, look if it's easier, I can read it to the guy. 551 00:25:59,626 --> 00:26:02,028 Blow it out your asshole. 552 00:26:02,061 --> 00:26:03,896 FAIR ENOUGH. 553 00:26:03,930 --> 00:26:06,933 Let me do my job. 554 00:26:06,966 --> 00:26:08,935 - OKAY. - "BORED-- 555 00:26:08,968 --> 00:26:10,937 BORED WITH 556 00:26:10,970 --> 00:26:16,375 L-L-L-LONELY NIGHTS ALONE? 557 00:26:16,408 --> 00:26:18,945 TIRED OF 558 00:26:18,978 --> 00:26:23,950 - BE A THIRD WHEEL? - WHEEL. 559 00:26:23,983 --> 00:26:28,921 JUST WANT TO HAVE 560 00:26:28,955 --> 00:26:30,923 SOME F-F-F-- 561 00:26:30,957 --> 00:26:32,925 ONLY-- 562 00:26:32,959 --> 00:26:35,728 HELLO. YES. 563 00:26:35,762 --> 00:26:37,730 NO, IT SAYS “BOYS TOYS FOR RENT. 564 00:26:37,764 --> 00:26:41,067 Are you bored? LONELY NIGHTS ALONE? DO YOU JUST WANT TO HAVE FUN? 565 00:26:41,100 --> 00:26:44,070 CALL THE BOY TOY! 555-0188. 566 00:26:44,103 --> 00:26:46,405 SATISFACTION AND Discretion guaranteed. 567 00:26:46,438 --> 00:26:49,075 IN ORDER. B-B-BYE. 568 00:26:49,108 --> 00:26:50,643 (giggles) OK. 569 00:26:52,879 --> 00:26:55,682 HOW MUCH DO I OWE YOU? 570 00:26:55,715 --> 00:26:57,650 $2100. 571 00:26:57,684 --> 00:27:00,820 Wow, $2100? FOR WHAT, MAN? 572 00:27:00,853 --> 00:27:05,291 WHAT ARE YOU DOING-- WHAT DO YOU EXPECT? 573 00:27:05,324 --> 00:27:08,394 THAT-- THAT'S NOT 574 00:27:08,427 --> 00:27:10,396 “THE SAVER.” 575 00:27:10,429 --> 00:27:15,434 THAT IS “THE HOLLYWOOD BEAT” 576 00:27:15,467 --> 00:27:17,704 OF COURSE NOT. 577 00:27:17,737 --> 00:27:19,839 - --THE NUMBER-- - GOOD GOOD. 578 00:27:19,872 --> 00:27:22,842 NOW 200. I'll do the rest for you Receptionist at the door, okay? 579 00:27:22,875 --> 00:27:26,445 - GREAT. THANK YOU VERY MUCH. - --A MESSAGE-- 580 00:27:26,478 --> 00:27:29,281 - LOOK AT THIS. - --THE NUMBER ONE 581 00:27:29,315 --> 00:27:32,418 NEWS-- NEWSPAPER-- 582 00:27:32,451 --> 00:27:34,420 - OKAY. - --THE LONGEST-- 583 00:27:34,453 --> 00:27:38,324 - --RUNNING NEWSPAPER. - --RUNNING NEWSP-- 584 00:27:41,293 --> 00:27:43,730 - (Game on TV) - SHOOT SHOOT. 585 00:27:43,763 --> 00:27:46,799 - OH, you son of a bitch. - (cell phone rings) 586 00:27:46,833 --> 00:27:48,367 - YOU BASTARD. - That was close, man. 587 00:27:48,400 --> 00:27:49,902 - Jake: IS YOUR PHONE RINGING? - YES. 588 00:27:49,936 --> 00:27:51,904 - LET ME HOLD THIS FOR A SECOND. - NO, JAKE. 589 00:27:51,938 --> 00:27:53,139 - ONE SECOND. - JAKE, JAKE. 590 00:27:53,172 --> 00:27:55,141 LISTEN, RONNIE, I think I used it 591 00:27:55,174 --> 00:27:57,143 YOUR PHONE NUMBER IN THE ADVERT. 592 00:27:57,176 --> 00:28:00,012 - Do you think you did it? - HELLO, THIS IS A BOY'S TOY. 593 00:28:00,046 --> 00:28:03,415 - OH HEY, MOUSE. - SHOOT! 594 00:28:03,449 --> 00:28:06,485 Yes, some chick GAVE ME THE ADDRESS TO THIS YOGA PLACE. 595 00:28:06,518 --> 00:28:08,320 NO, I WILL Go there now. 596 00:28:08,354 --> 00:28:10,322 Okay, bye. Let's go. 597 00:28:10,356 --> 00:28:12,324 SHE DIDN'T WANT TO TALK TO ME? 598 00:28:12,358 --> 00:28:16,863 ARE YOU BUSY RIGHT NOW? 599 00:28:16,896 --> 00:28:18,898 I'm watching the game. 600 00:28:18,931 --> 00:28:21,067 I need a ride IN ABOUT FIVE MINUTES TO YOGA. 601 00:28:21,100 --> 00:28:23,936 Also, I need to borrow something A PAIR OF PANTS, MAYBE A TOP. 602 00:28:23,970 --> 00:28:26,405 - (buzzer sounds) - GOAL! YES! 603 00:28:26,438 --> 00:28:29,041 OH, WHAT A GOAL! 604 00:28:29,075 --> 00:28:31,844 THIS IS THE PLACE RIGHT HERE. 605 00:28:31,878 --> 00:28:34,146 OK. GOOD? 606 00:28:34,180 --> 00:28:35,314 YES. 607 00:28:35,347 --> 00:28:37,316 - A HUG? - NO. 608 00:28:37,349 --> 00:28:39,318 OKAY GOOD. All right, be safe. 609 00:28:39,351 --> 00:28:40,486 I'LL CALL YOU LATER. 610 00:28:40,519 --> 00:28:42,721 OK. 611 00:28:45,124 --> 00:28:47,093 MAKE ME PROUD. 612 00:28:47,126 --> 00:28:49,095 DO IT FOR ME. 613 00:28:49,128 --> 00:28:51,163 - I love you, buddy. - LOVE YOU. 614 00:28:53,800 --> 00:28:56,202 - HELLO. - HELLO. 615 00:28:59,839 --> 00:29:01,841 WHAT'S UP? 616 00:29:21,060 --> 00:29:22,561 Wow. 617 00:29:22,594 --> 00:29:25,297 *I WANT A HUNK, A HUNK 618 00:29:26,966 --> 00:29:29,401 *I WANT A HUNK, A HUNK* 619 00:29:31,337 --> 00:29:34,006 *I WANT A HUNK, A HUNK 620 00:29:35,908 --> 00:29:37,944 *I WANT A HUNK, A KING... * 621 00:29:47,053 --> 00:29:50,122 I LOVE YOGA. 622 00:29:53,926 --> 00:29:55,494 HELLO. NORAH. 623 00:29:55,527 --> 00:29:57,496 PRETTY. I'm JAKE. 624 00:29:57,529 --> 00:29:59,498 LISTEN, THIS IS MY FIRST TIME TO YOGA, 625 00:29:59,531 --> 00:30:01,934 So I didn't really know What to wear, you know, 626 00:30:01,968 --> 00:30:03,569 IF YOU CAN SAY IT BY WHAT I WEAR. 627 00:30:03,602 --> 00:30:05,071 I CAN SEE THAT. 628 00:30:05,104 --> 00:30:08,507 Listen, I was wondering Maybe you and I could Get into a partnership or something 629 00:30:08,540 --> 00:30:10,509 And you could show me A FEW MOVES. 630 00:30:10,542 --> 00:30:12,912 THANK YOU VERY MUCH. ACTUALLY I'LL SHOW YOU LOTS OF MOVEMENTS. 631 00:30:12,945 --> 00:30:15,614 - I AM THE TEACHER. - OH, YOU ARE THE TEACHER. 632 00:30:15,647 --> 00:30:18,851 OH, THAT'S GREAT. I REALLY HAVE ONE Naturally athletic body, 633 00:30:18,885 --> 00:30:20,386 So don't hold back. PRESS ME. 634 00:30:20,419 --> 00:30:21,620 Okay, I'll keep that IN MIND. 635 00:30:21,653 --> 00:30:24,123 What are you drinking there? Don't tell me. LET ME GUESS. 636 00:30:24,156 --> 00:30:27,526 IT'S A PROTEIN STRAWBERRY Blueberry mocha shake? 637 00:30:27,559 --> 00:30:30,196 - WATER. - GOD, WATER. 638 00:30:30,229 --> 00:30:31,864 - I was close, wasn't I? - CLOSE. 639 00:30:31,898 --> 00:30:34,433 LET ME GUESS They try to guess WHAT SHE LIKES TO DRINK 640 00:30:34,466 --> 00:30:37,469 So she could actually fall FOR ONE OF YOUR LITTLE ONE HIGH SCHOOL ONE LINERS. 641 00:30:37,503 --> 00:30:40,039 Actually, yes. 642 00:30:40,072 --> 00:30:42,341 OH, well, that's a shame BECAUSE MY FRIEND HAS NORAH HERE 643 00:30:42,374 --> 00:30:44,643 HAS A VERY STRICT PERSONALITY AND PROFESSIONAL POLITICS 644 00:30:44,676 --> 00:30:46,913 Where she doesn't date YOUR STUDENTS-- 645 00:30:46,946 --> 00:30:49,481 - BUT I-- - --ALWAYS. 646 00:30:49,515 --> 00:30:51,483 Which is such a shame. 647 00:30:51,517 --> 00:30:53,385 BUT IT'S NOTHING PERSONAL. 648 00:30:53,419 --> 00:30:56,622 I just don't date my students. Why don't you go and find a place? 649 00:30:56,655 --> 00:30:58,958 I think you got it THE WRONG IMPRESSION ABOUT ME, OKAY? 650 00:30:58,991 --> 00:31:00,960 I'm here because of my job AND to train, maybe-- 651 00:31:00,993 --> 00:31:03,395 JAKE, I'm so glad That you came. 652 00:31:03,429 --> 00:31:05,998 - Isn't that the cutest thing? YOGA STUDIO NOW? - YES. 653 00:31:06,032 --> 00:31:08,968 And you met my friend Norah. NORAH IS THE BEST. 654 00:31:09,001 --> 00:31:10,903 - I DID. SHE'S GREAT. - THANK YOU, JEANIE. 655 00:31:10,937 --> 00:31:12,571 -HELLO KYLIE. - Bye JEANIE. 656 00:31:12,604 --> 00:31:14,206 There is space next to me Rear. 657 00:31:14,240 --> 00:31:15,507 - I-- NO-- - OH, COME ON. 658 00:31:15,541 --> 00:31:17,076 THANKS FOR BRINGING IT YOUR FRIEND. 659 00:31:18,945 --> 00:31:22,214 Remember, of course ATHLETIC BODY. PRESS ME. 660 00:31:22,248 --> 00:31:24,216 - WHAT A LOSER. - GO TO YOUR MAT. 661 00:31:24,250 --> 00:31:26,118 All right, guys, welcome. 662 00:31:26,152 --> 00:31:28,020 LET'S JUST STAND HERE FOR A SECOND 663 00:31:28,054 --> 00:31:30,422 INHALE, Letting go all day, 664 00:31:30,456 --> 00:31:33,960 put it in front of the door, Focus on the present moment, 665 00:31:33,993 --> 00:31:36,695 INHALE, 666 00:31:36,728 --> 00:31:40,132 Breathe out through your nose. GREAT. WONDERFUL. 667 00:31:40,166 --> 00:31:41,700 THESE LOOK BEAUTIFUL, YOUR-- 668 00:31:41,733 --> 00:31:43,669 BEAUTIFUL. 669 00:31:43,702 --> 00:31:46,405 Okay, let's breathe in. 670 00:31:46,438 --> 00:31:49,976 When you breathe out, LET'S BEND THE FRONT LEG A LITTLE DEEPER. 671 00:31:50,009 --> 00:31:51,944 WONDERFUL. LET'S STAY THERE, 672 00:31:51,978 --> 00:31:56,082 INHALE, EXHALE, RELAXATION OF OUR SHOULDER. 673 00:31:56,115 --> 00:31:59,151 The front knee is bent. GREAT. WONDERFUL. 674 00:31:59,185 --> 00:32:02,221 THESE LOOK BEAUTIFUL, You are beautiful. 675 00:32:02,254 --> 00:32:04,490 Okay, let's breathe in. 676 00:32:04,523 --> 00:32:07,393 When you breathe out, LET'S BEND THE FRONT LEG. 677 00:32:07,426 --> 00:32:09,228 GREAT. Good job, JAKE. UH-HUH. 678 00:32:09,261 --> 00:32:13,032 Okay, let's move on Our front leg bent, BACK LEG STRAIGHT. 679 00:32:13,065 --> 00:32:17,136 - HIPS BE NEWS THE FRONT OF THE ROOM. - (Robert farts) 680 00:32:17,169 --> 00:32:19,972 Great job, guys. 681 00:32:20,006 --> 00:32:21,507 EVERYONE DID AWESOME. 682 00:32:21,540 --> 00:32:23,475 YES. 683 00:32:23,509 --> 00:32:25,011 See you next week. 684 00:32:25,044 --> 00:32:27,179 OH, THAT WASN'T IT SO RELAXING? 685 00:32:27,213 --> 00:32:29,648 RELAXATION IS NOT REAL A word I would use 686 00:32:29,681 --> 00:32:31,650 - To describe what we just did. - OH I'M SORRY. 687 00:32:31,683 --> 00:32:36,088 I've been thinking about going TO THE PARK AND RUNNING. DO YOU WANT TO COME? 688 00:32:36,122 --> 00:32:38,490 - THIS IS ACTUALLY A GREAT IDEA. - YES? 689 00:32:38,524 --> 00:32:41,227 Yes, but I will stay Here for a while. BUT I WILL We'll meet later. 690 00:32:41,260 --> 00:32:43,595 YES? PINKIE PROMISE? 691 00:32:43,629 --> 00:32:45,431 - OK GREAT. - OKAY. 692 00:32:45,464 --> 00:32:46,999 - See you later. - SECURE. 693 00:32:50,736 --> 00:32:52,104 (sighs) 694 00:32:52,138 --> 00:32:55,374 Good job, ROBERT. You're a natural. 695 00:32:55,407 --> 00:32:56,708 REALLY? 696 00:32:56,742 --> 00:32:58,777 - Until the next course? - YES, SURE, YES. 697 00:32:58,810 --> 00:33:02,048 - OKAY. BYE, PEOPLE. - (cell phone rings) 698 00:33:07,719 --> 00:33:09,088 BOYS TOYS. 699 00:33:09,121 --> 00:33:10,356 (gasps) 700 00:33:14,593 --> 00:33:16,628 (buzz) 701 00:33:29,175 --> 00:33:30,809 IS THIS MY BEARD TRIMMER? 702 00:33:30,842 --> 00:33:33,445 YES YES, MAN. 703 00:33:33,479 --> 00:33:35,514 I have to free the COBRA FROM THE JUNGLE, YOU KNOW? 704 00:33:35,547 --> 00:33:38,050 (humming continues) 705 00:33:38,084 --> 00:33:40,486 DO YOU MIND? 706 00:33:40,519 --> 00:33:42,288 LIGHT UP. 707 00:33:47,126 --> 00:33:49,128 THANKS DUDE. 708 00:34:01,373 --> 00:34:03,809 The question is who THE FIRST HAPPY LADY 709 00:34:03,842 --> 00:34:06,678 JUMP ON THE JAKE TRAIN? 710 00:34:06,712 --> 00:34:08,514 BITCH IS HOT. 711 00:34:08,547 --> 00:34:12,851 Yes, she has a handful. 712 00:34:12,884 --> 00:34:16,122 (quiet music plays) 713 00:34:17,589 --> 00:34:20,092 I LIKE THIS PLACE. 714 00:34:20,126 --> 00:34:21,860 A GREAT PLACE. 715 00:34:21,893 --> 00:34:25,531 Cheers to us. 716 00:34:26,898 --> 00:34:29,468 So, SANDRA DEAN, 717 00:34:29,501 --> 00:34:32,238 TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF. WHERE DO YOU COME FROM? 718 00:34:32,271 --> 00:34:36,842 Well, I'm a southern girl, PUMPKIN. 719 00:34:36,875 --> 00:34:39,545 I HAVE HAD FIVE LOVING HUSBAND. 720 00:34:39,578 --> 00:34:41,180 - FIVE? - BUT THEY all fell over 721 00:34:41,213 --> 00:34:44,216 IN FRONT OF OUR FIVE YEAR OLD ANNIVERSARY. 722 00:34:44,250 --> 00:34:46,685 Well, I guess I just am BURN THEM OUT. 723 00:34:46,718 --> 00:34:48,554 OOH OOH. 724 00:34:48,587 --> 00:34:51,657 YOU CAN'T GET TOO MUCH DONE SANDRA DEAN! 725 00:34:51,690 --> 00:34:53,425 (happy song plays) 726 00:34:53,459 --> 00:34:55,694 OH I LOVE THIS SONG. 727 00:34:55,727 --> 00:34:58,530 (snap fingers) 728 00:35:07,239 --> 00:35:09,475 Hello JAKE. REMEMBER ME? 729 00:35:09,508 --> 00:35:12,644 BECCA. BECCA. 730 00:35:12,678 --> 00:35:14,680 OF COURSE I REMEMBER YOU. HOW COULD I FORGET YOU, 731 00:35:14,713 --> 00:35:16,682 BECCA? 732 00:35:20,286 --> 00:35:23,589 IN ORDER. 733 00:35:23,622 --> 00:35:27,926 This is my... my aunt SANDRA, My father's sister. 734 00:35:27,959 --> 00:35:31,563 WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? I haven't heard from you yet AFTER THAT NIGHT. 735 00:35:31,597 --> 00:35:34,266 OH, I WAS-- I WAS, YOU KNOW, 736 00:35:34,300 --> 00:35:36,902 IN THE TESTIMONY PROTECTION PROGRAM. 737 00:35:36,935 --> 00:35:39,771 -OH. - GERARD, COME ON. 738 00:35:39,805 --> 00:35:43,209 -GERARD? - Um, that's my alias. 739 00:35:43,242 --> 00:35:45,377 OH, ALL CLEAR. 740 00:35:45,411 --> 00:35:47,279 - YOU SHOULD CALL ME... - I WILL. 741 00:35:47,313 --> 00:35:49,548 - ...WHEN YOU ARE DONE Witness protection thing. - YES. 742 00:35:49,581 --> 00:35:51,683 I REALLY missed YOU. 743 00:35:51,717 --> 00:35:53,685 - SAME NUMBER? - UH-HUH. 744 00:35:53,719 --> 00:35:55,721 - All right, great. - BYE. 745 00:35:58,990 --> 00:36:01,627 OH MY SWEET HEAVEN, This is your date? 746 00:36:01,660 --> 00:36:04,630 OH DEAR GOD, She smokes hot. 747 00:36:06,898 --> 00:36:08,500 I'll go out with her FOR MONEY. 748 00:36:08,534 --> 00:36:11,503 NO NO, THIS IS NOT MY DATE. My date is right behind you. 749 00:36:11,537 --> 00:36:13,405 REALLY? 750 00:36:13,439 --> 00:36:15,307 WHO IS THAT? 751 00:36:15,341 --> 00:36:17,509 This gentleman is a friend My name is Ronnie. 752 00:36:17,543 --> 00:36:19,211 - HELLO HELLO. - YES, say hello. 753 00:36:19,245 --> 00:36:21,313 PLEASED TO MEET YOU. You belong to Gerard...? 754 00:36:21,347 --> 00:36:24,316 - I LIKE. - OH, SHE IS-- 755 00:36:24,350 --> 00:36:26,318 HOW MUCH MORE FOR A THREESOME? 756 00:36:26,352 --> 00:36:29,321 - FOR A THREESOME? - WE-- I DON'T THINK-- 757 00:36:29,355 --> 00:36:32,391 WOW, I don't know. How much does a threesome cost? 758 00:36:32,424 --> 00:36:34,993 (giggles) 759 00:36:35,026 --> 00:36:39,931 * SO BE MY BABY GIGOLO 760 00:36:39,965 --> 00:36:42,768 * AND GO WHERE I WILL GO... * 761 00:36:42,801 --> 00:36:44,770 HA HA! MMM! 762 00:36:44,803 --> 00:36:47,439 TAKE THIS OFF. 763 00:36:50,342 --> 00:36:52,311 * IT WILL NOT LAST 764 00:36:52,344 --> 00:36:54,780 * ANYTIME... 765 00:36:54,813 --> 00:36:57,716 WAIT WAIT WAIT. Wow, one second, one second. 766 00:36:57,749 --> 00:37:01,353 I'm sorry, SANDRA, I don't know-- I'M NOT DOING IT. 767 00:37:01,387 --> 00:37:03,722 WHAT ARE YOU NOT DOING? 768 00:37:03,755 --> 00:37:06,592 I'M NOT DOING IT. I'm not going all the way. 769 00:37:06,625 --> 00:37:08,594 I'M SORRY. IT'S NOTHING PERSONAL. 770 00:37:08,627 --> 00:37:10,996 IT'S MORE PROFESSIONAL WHAT I HAVE, DO YOU KNOW? 771 00:37:11,029 --> 00:37:14,300 Well, how about a dry hump? 772 00:37:14,333 --> 00:37:15,601 WHAT? 773 00:37:15,634 --> 00:37:17,603 - YOU JUST SIT THERE. - NO, I KNOW WHAT IT IS. 774 00:37:17,636 --> 00:37:20,339 I'll do all the work. 775 00:37:20,372 --> 00:37:22,741 (Sandra moans) 776 00:37:22,774 --> 00:37:24,810 (laughs) 777 00:37:28,814 --> 00:37:31,550 * I HAD A FEELING IT WAS LOVELY* 778 00:37:31,583 --> 00:37:34,320 * AFTER I SAW YOUR PHOTO * 779 00:37:34,353 --> 00:37:37,756 * YOU LOOK SO GOOD IN BLACK AND WHITE... * 780 00:37:37,789 --> 00:37:39,758 (screaming) 781 00:37:39,791 --> 00:37:41,760 * YOU KNOW THE FEELING 782 00:37:41,793 --> 00:37:44,430 * IF YOU SEE SOMETHING YOU REALLY HAVE TO HAVE THIS* 783 00:37:44,463 --> 00:37:47,399 *EVEN IF ONLY FOR ONE NIGHT? * 784 00:37:51,803 --> 00:37:56,375 * SO BE MY BABY GIGOLO... 785 00:37:56,408 --> 00:37:59,478 HEY, NORAH, I have A LITTLE PROBLEM. 786 00:37:59,511 --> 00:38:02,080 YOU SEE, THERE IS REALLY GREAT BAND PLAYING THIS FRIDAY 787 00:38:02,113 --> 00:38:04,816 - IN THE BAR OF A FRIEND OF MINE. - WHAT IS THE PROBLEM? 788 00:38:04,850 --> 00:38:08,086 I haven't figured it out yet A WAY TO MAKE YOU CUM STILL WITH ME. 789 00:38:08,119 --> 00:38:12,424 Look, JAKE, I don't do that I really date my students. 790 00:38:12,458 --> 00:38:15,093 Okay, okay, that's fine. 791 00:38:15,126 --> 00:38:17,596 Well, we can go and call A STUDENT-TEACHER CONFERENCE, 792 00:38:17,629 --> 00:38:20,499 YOU KNOW? IT WILL BE FUN. 793 00:38:20,532 --> 00:38:22,501 I don't know how To put it politely: 794 00:38:22,534 --> 00:38:24,770 But I really don't go on dates People in your industry. 795 00:38:24,803 --> 00:38:26,838 MY WORK AREA? 796 00:38:26,872 --> 00:38:30,075 Yes, let me guess, that's you A HOLLYWOOD SOMETHING. 797 00:38:30,108 --> 00:38:32,544 HOLLYWOOD SOME--? NO, I AM MORE OF 798 00:38:32,578 --> 00:38:35,747 A CONVERSATION ENTREPRENEURSHIP, DO YOU KNOW? 799 00:38:35,781 --> 00:38:38,384 Come on, let's go outside JUST FOR A FEW DRINKS. 800 00:38:38,417 --> 00:38:39,485 IT WILL BE GREAT. 801 00:38:39,518 --> 00:38:41,487 WHAT DO YOU SAY? 802 00:38:41,520 --> 00:38:43,489 LIGHT UP. 803 00:38:43,522 --> 00:38:47,426 Okay, well, well, well, AS A STUDENT TEACHER, OKAY? 804 00:38:47,459 --> 00:38:48,827 - A STUDENT TEACHER? - YES. 805 00:38:48,860 --> 00:38:50,829 SO HER NAME IS MARY 806 00:38:50,862 --> 00:38:52,831 And you pick them up IN YOUR PLACE. 807 00:38:52,864 --> 00:38:55,434 AND SHE HAS THE DATE EVERYTHING PLANNED. 808 00:38:55,467 --> 00:38:58,136 Okay, please tell me IT IS AN UPGRADE FROM MY LAST CUSTOMER. 809 00:38:58,169 --> 00:39:00,739 OH, SURE. She's so much more mature. 810 00:39:00,772 --> 00:39:04,142 TIRES? REALLY? I can handle that. 811 00:39:04,175 --> 00:39:05,677 Read them and cry, idiots. 812 00:39:05,711 --> 00:39:08,380 OH, DID WE WON? I don't understand this game. 813 00:39:08,414 --> 00:39:10,382 DAMN RIGHT. I took money 814 00:39:10,416 --> 00:39:12,884 BY DIERDRA SINCE THE EISENHOWER ADMINISTRATION. 815 00:39:12,918 --> 00:39:15,153 - SHE CHEATED. - I HEARD YOU. 816 00:39:15,186 --> 00:39:17,989 - GOOD. - WANT A PIECE OF THIS? 817 00:39:18,023 --> 00:39:20,526 OKAY WHOA WHOA WHOA. IT'S NOT WORTH IT 818 00:39:20,559 --> 00:39:22,661 OK, MARY? SHE IS NOT ALSO IN YOUR CLASS. 819 00:39:22,694 --> 00:39:24,963 Did you call my Dierdra? AN ASS? 820 00:39:24,996 --> 00:39:26,998 WHAT? 821 00:39:27,032 --> 00:39:29,401 NO NO NO, FRED. NO, FRED. 822 00:39:29,435 --> 00:39:31,169 Relax, buddy. I didn't call her An ass, all right? 823 00:39:31,202 --> 00:39:34,440 You don't want to break YOUR HIPS OR BREASTS A LUNG. FRED, FRED. 824 00:39:34,473 --> 00:39:36,442 TONGUE? YOU CAN SOMETHING TOGETHER TO HER? 825 00:39:36,475 --> 00:39:38,176 LISTEN, BOY, You stay away from my wife. 826 00:39:38,209 --> 00:39:40,879 WHAT? Look, that wasn't me I'm talking to your wife, Fred. 827 00:39:40,912 --> 00:39:42,781 - FREDDY, I think I wet myself. - I talked to Mary. 828 00:39:42,814 --> 00:39:45,016 OH GOD. JESUS, FRED. 829 00:39:45,050 --> 00:39:47,419 HOW DO YOU LIKE ME NOW, PERVERT? 830 00:39:47,453 --> 00:39:49,488 - DAMNED. Good Lord. -Kick his wrinkled ass, GERALD. 831 00:39:49,521 --> 00:39:52,758 - WHY DID YOU DO THAT? - BRING IT ON, SONNY. 832 00:39:52,791 --> 00:39:54,793 - I won't fight you. I won't hit you. - LIGHT UP. 833 00:39:54,826 --> 00:39:56,962 - I think I got wet, Freddy. - YOU'RE JUST JEALOUS 834 00:39:56,995 --> 00:39:59,831 - BECAUSE FRED CAN'T COME His thing-a-ling is even more there. - I won't fight you. 835 00:39:59,865 --> 00:40:02,434 - Jake: THANK YOU FOR EVERYTHING. - ARGH! 836 00:40:02,468 --> 00:40:04,436 Now you've thrown your back out. I HOPE YOU ARE HAPPY. 837 00:40:04,470 --> 00:40:06,438 - (Fred groans) - See you later, idiots. 838 00:40:06,472 --> 00:40:08,440 LET US GET YOUR STUFF HERE. 839 00:40:08,474 --> 00:40:10,709 OKAY, THEN GO. CALM DOWN. 840 00:40:12,611 --> 00:40:15,013 Jake: THESE WOMEN REFLECT BADLY 841 00:40:15,046 --> 00:40:16,748 ON ME AS A PROFESSIONAL MOUSE. 842 00:40:16,782 --> 00:40:18,216 We have to improve OUR GAME. 843 00:40:18,249 --> 00:40:20,218 I DON'T UNDERSTAND Why you are complaining. 844 00:40:20,251 --> 00:40:22,554 You just made $2000 THIS WEEK. 845 00:40:22,588 --> 00:40:25,123 THAT'S MORE MONEY THAN YOU DID LAST YEAR. 846 00:40:25,156 --> 00:40:27,125 - YOU MADE $2,000 THIS WEEK? - YES. 847 00:40:27,158 --> 00:40:29,761 - I WILL BE SEEING Any of this? - NO NOT NOW. 848 00:40:29,795 --> 00:40:33,064 DO YOU KNOW WHY? BECAUSE I was the one who got it DRY HIMPING BY THE WHALEOPOLUS. 849 00:40:33,098 --> 00:40:35,534 I WAS THE ONE WHO HAD TO LEAVE OUT WITH A SENIOR 850 00:40:35,567 --> 00:40:37,469 ON THE SIDEWALK IN BROAD DAYLIGHT, NOT THE TWO OF YOU. 851 00:40:37,503 --> 00:40:39,471 Okay, I don't know WHAT YOU WANT FROM ME. 852 00:40:39,505 --> 00:40:42,841 Nobody said this job would work BE FUNNY. RONNIE, did you say? Would this job be fun? 853 00:40:42,874 --> 00:40:44,610 I didn't say this job WOULD BE FUN. 854 00:40:44,643 --> 00:40:46,612 IT'S NOT ABOUT FUN, YOU IDIOTS. 855 00:40:46,645 --> 00:40:48,980 IT'S ABOUT PROFESSIONALISM, OKAY? WE NEED TO UPGRADE 856 00:40:49,014 --> 00:40:51,850 IF WE WILL WIN NEW CUSTOMERS. Don't you understand that? 857 00:40:51,883 --> 00:40:53,819 I WILL ALSO NEED A NEW CAR. 858 00:40:53,852 --> 00:40:56,522 HOW TO HAVE A NEW CAR? IF YOU DON'T HAVE A CAR FIRST? 859 00:40:56,555 --> 00:40:58,256 - YES. - DID YOU FORGET ABOUT MY CAR-- 860 00:40:58,289 --> 00:41:00,926 My life's savings FOR MY SMART CAR? 861 00:41:00,959 --> 00:41:03,629 Listen to me, okay? 862 00:41:03,662 --> 00:41:05,631 THERE'S OVER $2000 HERE. 863 00:41:05,664 --> 00:41:08,066 BUT WE HAVE TO REINVEST IT BACK TO THE COMPANY. 864 00:41:08,099 --> 00:41:10,736 DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT? So, mouse, take this, 865 00:41:10,769 --> 00:41:13,104 Go get me a car. A really sweet car SWEET CAR. 866 00:41:13,138 --> 00:41:14,740 I CAN'T DRIVE THAT THUGS MORE. 867 00:41:14,773 --> 00:41:16,875 FINE. 868 00:41:16,908 --> 00:41:20,546 I ALSO RECEIVE THE FINAL APPROVAL ON ALL DATES. 869 00:41:20,579 --> 00:41:23,515 DO YOU UNDERSTAND? I only want hot cougars FROM NOW ON. 870 00:41:23,549 --> 00:41:25,651 NO MORE B-TEAM Nonsense, okay? 871 00:41:25,684 --> 00:41:29,054 YOU MUST BE HOT-- HOT WOMEN, HOT COUGARS, HOT PEOPLE. 872 00:41:29,087 --> 00:41:30,288 - OKAY. - DID YOU GET IT? 873 00:41:30,321 --> 00:41:32,558 - I HAVE IT. - GOOD. 874 00:41:34,192 --> 00:41:37,195 ONE MORE THING-- I'm going on a date TONIGHT WITH NORAH. 875 00:41:37,228 --> 00:41:39,598 I'll take it TO THE HORN TOAD. 876 00:41:39,631 --> 00:41:41,600 I probably won't do that PAY FOR EVERYTHING, 877 00:41:41,633 --> 00:41:44,035 I won't leave a tip either, Just so you know. 878 00:41:45,771 --> 00:41:47,873 When do you ever do that? Pay for anything? 879 00:41:49,207 --> 00:41:52,143 This is my room, Idiot. 880 00:41:52,177 --> 00:41:54,145 - Norah: THANK YOU. - Ronnie: YES, NO PROBLEM. 881 00:41:54,179 --> 00:41:56,147 - (Bottles ring) -OH. 882 00:41:56,181 --> 00:41:57,816 Is that your buddy? 883 00:41:57,849 --> 00:41:59,751 YES YES, THAT'S MINE BEST FRIEND RONNIE. 884 00:41:59,785 --> 00:42:01,987 We moved here together When we graduated college. 885 00:42:02,020 --> 00:42:03,789 - You went to college? - I DID. 886 00:42:03,822 --> 00:42:06,792 YES, I graduated with A B.A. IN WOMEN'S STUDIES. 887 00:42:06,825 --> 00:42:09,828 - YOU ARE JOKING. - IF YOU CANNOT CONTACT US WITH YOUR OWN FEMININE SIDE, 888 00:42:09,861 --> 00:42:13,298 HOW SHOULD YOU TOUCH Someone else's feminine side? 889 00:42:13,331 --> 00:42:15,300 (laughs) 890 00:42:15,333 --> 00:42:17,703 So what about it? THIS NEW JOB? 891 00:42:19,805 --> 00:42:22,741 It's kind of complicated. You see, a friend of mine – 892 00:42:22,774 --> 00:42:24,743 MOUSE – SHE’S IN THE P.R. 893 00:42:24,776 --> 00:42:27,613 AND SHE IS Somehow I hired myself 894 00:42:27,646 --> 00:42:30,015 AS A-- AS EVENT PLANNER-- 895 00:42:30,048 --> 00:42:33,184 Hosting parties FOR RICH PEOPLE, SUCH THING. 896 00:42:33,218 --> 00:42:35,186 - THAT'S COOL. - YES YES. 897 00:42:35,220 --> 00:42:38,189 Basically it's simple HIGH CLASS PARTIES FOR RICH PEOPLE. 898 00:42:38,223 --> 00:42:40,191 I'm like an MC. BASICALLY. 899 00:42:40,225 --> 00:42:42,828 I just kind of take care of myself THE NEEDS OF DIFFERENT PEOPLE, 900 00:42:42,861 --> 00:42:45,130 DEPENDING ON THE PARTY. 901 00:42:46,131 --> 00:42:47,298 THIS IS INTERESTING. 902 00:42:47,332 --> 00:42:49,300 So a pretty girl from the south LIKE YOURSELF 903 00:42:49,334 --> 00:42:52,070 RESIDENT IN LOS ANGELES IS SINGLE. HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE? 904 00:42:52,103 --> 00:42:56,207 I decided some time ago I didn't want to date models 905 00:42:56,241 --> 00:42:59,377 OR wannabe producers OR ACTOR. 906 00:42:59,410 --> 00:43:02,981 So that pretty much rules it out ALL IN LA 907 00:43:03,014 --> 00:43:05,250 YES, AND THE ONLY ONE What's left are these machos, 908 00:43:05,283 --> 00:43:08,386 Look how expensive my watch is Guys, yes. 909 00:43:08,419 --> 00:43:10,722 - BALL PLAYER. - BALL PLAYER. 910 00:43:10,756 --> 00:43:14,359 AND WITH THESE GUYS-- YOUR EGO IS ALWAYS BIGGER AS YOUR MASCULINITY. 911 00:43:14,392 --> 00:43:17,328 -OH. - AND IT'S A LITTLE DISAPPOINTING. 912 00:43:17,362 --> 00:43:20,866 WOW, LUCKY FOR ME, I have none of these qualities. 913 00:43:20,899 --> 00:43:23,935 I'm not macho. I don't even own a watch. 914 00:43:23,969 --> 00:43:28,406 HOWEVER, I AM Pretty well equipped. 915 00:43:28,439 --> 00:43:31,409 REALLY? WOW. 916 00:43:31,442 --> 00:43:34,079 - REALLY? - NO I'M NOT. 917 00:43:34,112 --> 00:43:35,781 - (applause) - We should get going But over there. 918 00:43:35,814 --> 00:43:37,683 YES, SHOULD WE? YES OK. 919 00:43:40,451 --> 00:43:44,756 * I STAND IN MY NAKED FEET * 920 00:43:44,790 --> 00:43:48,059 * I'm watching you 921 00:43:48,093 --> 00:43:50,729 * DRIVING AWAY 922 00:43:52,764 --> 00:43:56,067 * LAST NIGHT CONTINUES THROUGH MY HEAD... * 923 00:43:56,101 --> 00:43:59,137 WHY ARE MEN SO OBSESSED WITH YOUR PENIS SIZES? 924 00:43:59,170 --> 00:44:03,374 I think it was you Who raised the world of men? ACTUALLY PENIS SIZES. 925 00:44:03,408 --> 00:44:05,376 I think that you are right. 926 00:44:05,410 --> 00:44:08,379 * THAT WAS SO LONG AGO... 927 00:44:08,413 --> 00:44:10,916 This is a really good band. I HOPE YOU LIKE THEM. 928 00:44:10,949 --> 00:44:13,852 WHAT? Are you glad that I like you? 929 00:44:13,885 --> 00:44:15,854 WHAT? 930 00:44:15,887 --> 00:44:17,756 YES. 931 00:44:17,789 --> 00:44:20,358 - I meant the band. - OH, THE BAND? 932 00:44:20,391 --> 00:44:23,695 - YES, I thought you said-- - YES, I LOVE THE BAND. 933 00:44:23,729 --> 00:44:25,697 DO YOU LIKE ME? 934 00:44:25,731 --> 00:44:27,232 OH MY GOD, YES. THEY ARE GREAT. 935 00:44:27,265 --> 00:44:30,769 * THIS ADDICTION 936 00:44:30,802 --> 00:44:32,738 * WHEN I SEE YOU AGAIN 937 00:44:32,771 --> 00:44:35,774 * I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WOULD DO * 938 00:44:35,807 --> 00:44:38,744 * THE FEELING STILL LEFT * 939 00:44:38,777 --> 00:44:40,712 *I think I have 940 00:44:40,746 --> 00:44:43,749 * A HANGOVER FROM YOU 941 00:44:48,987 --> 00:44:54,025 * LAST NIGHT I CHECKED IN YOUR EYES * 942 00:44:54,059 --> 00:44:58,496 * AND SAW A FIRE BURNS BRIGHT...* 943 00:44:58,529 --> 00:45:00,832 HOLY SHIT. LISTEN. 944 00:45:00,866 --> 00:45:03,935 This is the PR lady FROM THIS CASTING I Bombed, remember? 945 00:45:03,969 --> 00:45:06,504 She's just burning hot LITTLE MILF. 946 00:45:06,537 --> 00:45:09,841 OH I KNOW YOU TOTALLY. This is BARBRA SKYPES. 947 00:45:09,875 --> 00:45:12,377 SHE HAS ONE OF THE LARGEST P.R. COMPANIES HERE IN L.A.-- 948 00:45:12,410 --> 00:45:16,815 FULLY LOADED AND SUPER SINGLE. 949 00:45:16,848 --> 00:45:18,516 She would be a great customer. 950 00:45:18,549 --> 00:45:20,952 All right, I'll see You two losers later. 951 00:45:20,986 --> 00:45:24,022 - Have fun at school, sweetie. - THANK YOU BABY. 952 00:45:26,391 --> 00:45:29,194 - WHAT DO YOU DO WHILE SITTING? HERE? Go and register them. - OH, RIGHT. 953 00:45:29,227 --> 00:45:30,762 - GET PAID. - I'M WORKING ON IT. 954 00:45:30,796 --> 00:45:32,998 EARN MONEY. Dad needs a new car. 955 00:45:33,999 --> 00:45:36,401 - GREAT. -MISS SKYPES. 956 00:45:36,434 --> 00:45:40,138 - CAN I HELP YOU? - HELLO. I'm MINDY LEE. 957 00:45:40,171 --> 00:45:44,175 HEY. I WORKED FOR MR CAHILL 958 00:45:44,209 --> 00:45:46,912 AND I AM ALSO KNOWN WITH YOUR FRIEND CLIVE. 959 00:45:46,945 --> 00:45:48,546 - CLIVE? - YES. 960 00:45:48,579 --> 00:45:50,949 OH, BUT DON'T WORRY. EVERYTHING I KNOW AND DO 961 00:45:50,982 --> 00:45:52,951 IS ALWAYS COMPLETE TRUST. 962 00:45:52,984 --> 00:45:55,453 AND HOW CAN I HELP YOU THEN, MINDY? 963 00:45:55,486 --> 00:45:57,889 OH PLEASE CALL ME MOUSE. 964 00:45:57,923 --> 00:46:02,027 MOUSE – THIS NAME DOES It actually rings. 965 00:46:02,060 --> 00:46:04,429 And you said you used to WORK FOR MR. CAHILL? 966 00:46:04,462 --> 00:46:07,365 - I DID. - AH, I know for sure WHO YOU ARE. 967 00:46:07,398 --> 00:46:10,902 You're the one who was sleeping WITH CAHILL AND HAS HIS CHAUVINIST ASS FIRED. 968 00:46:10,936 --> 00:46:13,204 - IT'S ME. - OH THANK YOU. 969 00:46:13,238 --> 00:46:15,073 I TELL YOU, I ALWAYS Thought he was an idiot. 970 00:46:15,106 --> 00:46:18,877 But since you fired him, My business increased by 20%. 971 00:46:18,910 --> 00:46:21,112 Yeah, well, he wasn't ALSO VERY GOOD. 972 00:46:21,146 --> 00:46:23,114 OH man, why am I not Are you surprised about this? 973 00:46:23,148 --> 00:46:27,452 So, MINDY--MOUSE, WHAT CAN I DO TO HELP YOU? 974 00:46:27,485 --> 00:46:29,454 I THOUGHT 975 00:46:29,487 --> 00:46:31,823 THAT, YOU KNOW, I helped you with that YOUR BUSINESS, 976 00:46:31,857 --> 00:46:33,424 YOU CAN HELP ME WITH MY. 977 00:46:33,458 --> 00:46:35,994 I HAVE A REALLY INTERESTING ONE SUGGESTION FOR YOU. 978 00:46:36,027 --> 00:46:38,897 Well, I'm always open TO INTERESTING SUGGESTIONS, 979 00:46:38,930 --> 00:46:41,199 ESPECIALLY FROM ENTERPRISING YOUNG WOMEN LIKE YOU, 980 00:46:41,232 --> 00:46:43,902 SO GO STRAIGHT AHEAD. 981 00:46:45,904 --> 00:46:49,174 Well, do you remember? THIS UNDERWEAR CAMPAIGN HAVE YOU CONTINUED TO WORK? 982 00:46:49,207 --> 00:46:51,877 THERE WAS A MODEL NAME GERARD. 983 00:46:51,910 --> 00:46:55,346 GERARD? 984 00:46:55,380 --> 00:46:59,584 So, MOUSETRAP, I have A QUESTION FOR YOU. 985 00:47:01,386 --> 00:47:03,521 HOW DID YOU DONE THAT BARBRA LANDEN? 986 00:47:03,554 --> 00:47:07,558 WHAT CAN I SAY? I am a saleswoman. 987 00:47:07,592 --> 00:47:09,627 Don't screw this up, JAKE. 988 00:47:09,660 --> 00:47:11,963 I mean, BARBRA is huge. 989 00:47:11,997 --> 00:47:14,265 SHE REALLY COULD BE ONE BIG CUSTOMER FOR US. 990 00:47:14,299 --> 00:47:16,434 You know, if she likes you, SHE COULD DROP YOUR NAME 991 00:47:16,467 --> 00:47:17,903 TO ALL YOUR RICHES OLD FRIENDS. 992 00:47:17,936 --> 00:47:20,939 MOUSE, I EVER HAVE Have you ever been let down? 993 00:47:22,573 --> 00:47:24,509 NO. (laughs) 994 00:47:26,144 --> 00:47:28,379 JORGE. 995 00:47:28,413 --> 00:47:30,015 FASTER. 996 00:47:30,048 --> 00:47:32,350 Look what she sent you. 997 00:47:32,383 --> 00:47:35,320 She wants you to wear this TO THE CHAMPAGNE THING. 998 00:47:35,353 --> 00:47:37,355 - YES YES YES. - SHE IS A DEMANDING WOMAN. 999 00:47:37,388 --> 00:47:39,357 OH YEAH, THAT'S FINE OK. 1000 00:47:39,390 --> 00:47:41,359 That looks sharp SUIT, BOY-O. 1001 00:47:41,392 --> 00:47:43,194 WELCOME TO FIRST CLASS. 1002 00:47:43,228 --> 00:47:44,562 SERIOUSLY. 1003 00:47:44,595 --> 00:47:46,564 All right, I'll do it THROW IT ON. 1004 00:47:46,597 --> 00:47:48,566 - DO YOU NEED HELP? - NO, THAT'S OK. 1005 00:47:48,599 --> 00:47:50,168 - NO, I THINK YOU-- - IT'S OKAY. 1006 00:47:50,201 --> 00:47:51,502 Come on, JAKE. 1007 00:47:51,536 --> 00:47:53,671 -DASHELLE. -HELLO, BARBRA. 1008 00:47:53,704 --> 00:47:56,541 OH, WELCOME. SO GLAD YOU CAME. 1009 00:47:56,574 --> 00:47:58,409 - THANKS. - Jake: HEY. 1010 00:47:58,443 --> 00:48:01,512 This is DASHELLE JONES. HE'S WITH BENJY BRATT NEW MOVIE. 1011 00:48:01,546 --> 00:48:03,514 - RIGHT. - SOFIA. 1012 00:48:03,548 --> 00:48:05,516 OH, LAST MONTH’S COVER Was FABULOUS. 1013 00:48:05,550 --> 00:48:08,353 - THANK YOU, BARB. - THANKS. 1014 00:48:08,386 --> 00:48:10,355 OH, THAT POOR GIRL. I TELL YOU 1015 00:48:10,388 --> 00:48:12,490 She just looked TERRIBLE ON THIS COVER-- 1016 00:48:12,523 --> 00:48:15,593 That's how much cola she has She shovels her nose up. 1017 00:48:15,626 --> 00:48:18,563 HELEN, what a SURPRISE. 1018 00:48:18,596 --> 00:48:20,631 BARBRA, YOU KNOW THAT FOR SURE How to throw a party, lady. 1019 00:48:20,665 --> 00:48:23,001 HELLO. AND YOU ARE? 1020 00:48:23,034 --> 00:48:26,037 These are Gerard, Helen, And he's with me tonight. 1021 00:48:26,071 --> 00:48:30,208 OH WOW, What a beautiful suit. 1022 00:48:30,241 --> 00:48:32,543 PAWS AWAY OR WE HAVE TO WILL REMOVE YOUR CLAWS. 1023 00:48:32,577 --> 00:48:34,545 JOY TO MEET YOU, HELEN. 1024 00:48:34,579 --> 00:48:36,547 THAT'S GOOD TO MEET YOU. 1025 00:48:36,581 --> 00:48:38,549 AND PLEASE Call me peaches, 1026 00:48:38,583 --> 00:48:40,551 LIKE THE SWEET FRUITS. 1027 00:48:40,585 --> 00:48:42,587 AND IN THIS LINE, 1028 00:48:42,620 --> 00:48:44,455 I think we'll get out. 1029 00:48:45,456 --> 00:48:47,425 Woman: PEACH, DARLING, 1030 00:48:47,458 --> 00:48:49,494 Come and take a look THE MAGNIFICENT WATERFALL. 1031 00:48:51,496 --> 00:48:53,664 - TAKE A SEAT. - OKAY. 1032 00:48:55,666 --> 00:48:57,635 GERARD, I like YOU. 1033 00:48:57,668 --> 00:48:59,570 UNTIL NOW YOU ARE An excellent date. 1034 00:48:59,604 --> 00:49:01,472 OH GREAT. 1035 00:49:01,506 --> 00:49:04,309 WHY DON’T WE GET A COUPLE? GROUND RULES SET, SHOULD WE? 1036 00:49:04,342 --> 00:49:07,078 - SECURE. - You should never flirt, 1037 00:49:07,112 --> 00:49:09,680 Petting or fornicating WITH EVERYONE IN MY FAMILY OR FRIENDS 1038 00:49:09,714 --> 00:49:12,250 Unless expressly stated otherwise PRIOR CONSENT. 1039 00:49:12,283 --> 00:49:13,985 NO PROBLEM. 1040 00:49:14,019 --> 00:49:15,987 - You learn quickly. - UH. 1041 00:49:16,021 --> 00:49:18,723 IF YOU ARE GOOD TO ME, I will be good to you. 1042 00:49:18,756 --> 00:49:20,725 THAT'S WHY I'M HERE. 1043 00:49:20,758 --> 00:49:23,694 WHAT BRINGS US ON THE SEXUAL SIDE. 1044 00:49:23,728 --> 00:49:25,396 I TAKE CARE OF MYSELF 1045 00:49:25,430 --> 00:49:27,698 I have an abundance of toys HOME THAT GIVES ME 1046 00:49:27,732 --> 00:49:30,335 MUCH MORE PLEASURE THAN THE AVERAGE MAN CAN BID. 1047 00:49:30,368 --> 00:49:32,337 Well, I'm not THE AVERAGE MAN, 1048 00:49:32,370 --> 00:49:35,006 BUT I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND Where you come from. 1049 00:49:35,040 --> 00:49:37,008 AND I WOULD TOO PAY ATTENTION TO 1050 00:49:37,042 --> 00:49:39,377 THAT YOU ARE MY BEST CUSTOMER. 1051 00:49:39,410 --> 00:49:42,080 Well, as long as you Treat me with respect, 1052 00:49:42,113 --> 00:49:45,316 YOU'LL EARN A PRETTY PENNY To be on my arm. 1053 00:49:45,350 --> 00:49:48,786 AND I COULD RECOMMEND YOUR SERVICES TO SOME OF MY FRIENDS. 1054 00:49:48,819 --> 00:49:51,589 REALLY? THIS IS GREAT. 1055 00:49:51,622 --> 00:49:54,092 AND IF I CAN SPEAK FRANCE, 1056 00:49:54,125 --> 00:49:56,361 I HAVE TO SAY THAT'S YOU WITH NEXT 1057 00:49:56,394 --> 00:50:00,531 THE MOST STUNNING 35 YEAR OLD A woman I've ever seen. 1058 00:50:00,565 --> 00:50:02,533 What a charming liar. 1059 00:50:02,567 --> 00:50:04,202 SHALL WE? 1060 00:50:04,235 --> 00:50:06,171 WE SHOULD. 1061 00:50:06,204 --> 00:50:08,739 * SATURDAY... 1062 00:50:16,547 --> 00:50:20,185 * YOU WERE A CHRISTIAN MAN, LORD. MCCANN * 1063 00:50:20,218 --> 00:50:22,753 *FOUND YOU SO HARD IN THE WEEK, You couldn't take it * 1064 00:50:22,787 --> 00:50:25,490 * WEAK AND STRAIGHT, HAS BEEN DELIVERED * 1065 00:50:25,523 --> 00:50:28,193 *Told you NEVER SUGGESTED THAT GIRL, BUT SHE WAS OPEN* 1066 00:50:28,226 --> 00:50:30,828 * ANYTHING TO MOVE YOUR FEET From where they were planted* 1067 00:50:30,861 --> 00:50:33,431 *OH, THE antics Has been replaced * 1068 00:50:33,464 --> 00:50:35,800 * LITTLE WHITE DEVIL, And she sounded romantic* 1069 00:50:35,833 --> 00:50:38,836 * SWEET SEMANTICS, SMILE NOW CRY LATER* 1070 00:50:38,869 --> 00:50:41,372 * CUSTOMIZED TIGHTNESS TO STEP* 1071 00:50:41,406 --> 00:50:44,175 * STRIPED COLOR SHIRT, MATCHING BELT, SUITABLE CONSIDER * 1072 00:50:44,209 --> 00:50:46,411 * SIMPLE BLONDE SHADES TO THE FADE IN THE TIPS * 1073 00:50:46,444 --> 00:50:49,414 * TO THE TIP OF THE HAIR, EVEN CROPPING NUDE* 1074 00:50:49,447 --> 00:50:51,849 * THE DEVIL-MAY-CARE ATTITUDE, YOU WERE NOT * 1075 00:50:51,882 --> 00:50:54,652 * BUT TONIGHT THE COSTUME, IT WAS ONLY BUSINESS* 1076 00:50:54,685 --> 00:50:57,388 * Rushing down a victim, CHICKENS THAT LEAVE YOU LONELY * 1077 00:50:57,422 --> 00:51:00,091 * SMOKING PACKS OF CIGARETTES Just like your friends* 1078 00:51:00,125 --> 00:51:02,727 * These are chain-smoking phonies In line to ride the pony* 1079 00:51:02,760 --> 00:51:05,230 * INCORRECT CONVERSATIONS, MOTIVATION MOTHER NEEDS A SOCK HERE * 1080 00:51:05,263 --> 00:51:07,865 *YOU COULD HAVE CONTROLLED YOUR COCK, SLABBER PUSS LOCKED YOU UP * 1081 00:51:07,898 --> 00:51:10,701 *WALKS INTO A SITUATION Nobody blocked * 1082 00:51:10,735 --> 00:51:13,671 * IT WAS IN THE MORNING SHOCKING, HARD WORK, HARDER PARTY* 1083 00:51:13,704 --> 00:51:15,673 * TRADED WITH THE DEVIL AND BECAME A MARTYR * 1084 00:51:15,706 --> 00:51:18,643 * AND HAVE FOUND A PARTNER IN DRAG, HIS NAME IS EBONY* 1085 00:51:18,676 --> 00:51:21,546 * YOUR SOUL SOLD UNTIL NIGHT, UNTIL MORNING FEELS EMPTY* 1086 00:51:21,579 --> 00:51:23,281 * YOU WORK SO HARD 1087 00:51:23,314 --> 00:51:25,883 * WITH LITTLE SLEEP TO KEEP THIS CARD * 1088 00:51:25,916 --> 00:51:28,419 * YOU HAVE SOLD YOUR SOUL ON A SATURDAY EVENING * 1089 00:51:28,453 --> 00:51:32,323 * YOU HAVE SOLD YOUR SOUL A SATURDAY EVENING * 1090 00:51:32,357 --> 00:51:34,225 * YOU WORK SO HARD 1091 00:51:34,259 --> 00:51:36,461 * WITH LITTLE SLEEP TO KEEP THIS CARD * 1092 00:51:36,494 --> 00:51:38,863 * YOU HAVE SOLD YOUR SOUL ON A SATURDAY EVENING * 1093 00:51:38,896 --> 00:51:41,899 * YOU HAVE SOLD YOUR SOUL A SATURDAY EVENING * 1094 00:51:41,932 --> 00:51:44,169 * SATURDAY... 1095 00:51:45,803 --> 00:51:48,173 OH YES. 1096 00:51:48,206 --> 00:51:51,242 YOU KNOW It's pretty physical You got this, Gerard. 1097 00:51:51,276 --> 00:51:53,211 THANK YOU, BARBRA. 1098 00:51:53,244 --> 00:51:55,913 I didn't train IN SIX MONTHS, 1099 00:51:55,946 --> 00:51:59,184 BUT I STARTED YOGA. 1100 00:51:59,217 --> 00:52:01,186 CAN I ASK YOU SOMETHING? 1101 00:52:01,219 --> 00:52:02,820 ANYTHING. 1102 00:52:02,853 --> 00:52:04,655 ARE YOU HAPPY? 1103 00:52:04,689 --> 00:52:07,358 BARBRA, I COULDN'T BE HAPPIER. 1104 00:52:07,392 --> 00:52:09,360 AND I OWE EVERYTHING TO YOU 1105 00:52:09,394 --> 00:52:11,762 AND OF COURSE MOUSE FOR JOINING US. 1106 00:52:11,796 --> 00:52:13,764 YES, FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE 1107 00:52:13,798 --> 00:52:16,534 I have everything I ever have WANTED-- MONEY, WOMEN, 1108 00:52:16,567 --> 00:52:19,337 A bed that doesn't smell LIKE CHEETOS AND PISS. 1109 00:52:19,370 --> 00:52:21,172 IT'S GREAT. 1110 00:52:21,206 --> 00:52:24,342 Well, there is something That has to be said. 1111 00:52:24,375 --> 00:52:27,445 SO ARE THE LADIES We treat you well? 1112 00:52:27,478 --> 00:52:29,447 CUSTOMERS, DO YOU MEAN? 1113 00:52:29,480 --> 00:52:32,283 OH YES I FORGOT. 1114 00:52:32,317 --> 00:52:35,420 YES YES, MOSTLY THEY WERE GREAT. 1115 00:52:35,453 --> 00:52:37,422 ALTHOUGH HELEN-- She was a little upset 1116 00:52:37,455 --> 00:52:39,424 When I told her I don't give a shit. 1117 00:52:39,457 --> 00:52:42,293 BUT SHE SEEMS To get away quite well I lick my ears, 1118 00:52:42,327 --> 00:52:44,295 Which is kind of strange BUT YOU KNOW 1119 00:52:44,329 --> 00:52:45,930 FITS THE AREA, RIGHT? 1120 00:52:45,963 --> 00:52:47,632 HMM. 1121 00:52:47,665 --> 00:52:49,934 THAT'S WHY I LIKE YOU BARBRA, you know? 1122 00:52:49,967 --> 00:52:51,936 I don't feel dirty WHEN I AM WITH YOU. 1123 00:52:51,969 --> 00:52:53,938 I FEEL LIKE YOU ACTUALLY 1124 00:52:53,971 --> 00:52:57,942 YOU APPRECIATE ME FOR ME, YOU KNOW? 1125 00:52:57,975 --> 00:53:00,278 ABOUT – GERARD, THERE IS SOMETHING 1126 00:53:00,311 --> 00:53:02,247 - I WANTED TO TALK TO YOU. - SECURE. 1127 00:53:02,280 --> 00:53:05,383 Excuse me, Miss Skypes, THERE IS ONE LORD. CLIVE HERE TO SEE THEM. 1128 00:53:05,416 --> 00:53:07,685 CLIVE? OH DEAR GOD. 1129 00:53:07,718 --> 00:53:09,987 Darling, keep that thought. 1130 00:53:10,020 --> 00:53:12,257 I'LL BE RIGHT BACK. 1131 00:53:16,361 --> 00:53:18,396 (cell phone rings) 1132 00:53:27,505 --> 00:53:28,973 HELLO. 1133 00:53:29,006 --> 00:53:31,342 HEY BABY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 1134 00:53:31,376 --> 00:53:34,745 Um, I'm with a customer ACTUALLY NOW. 1135 00:53:34,779 --> 00:53:37,482 OH, OKAY, REAL QUICK-- WHAT ARE YOU DOING TONIGHT? 1136 00:53:37,515 --> 00:53:40,017 I HAVE A SURPRISE FOR YOU. 1137 00:53:40,050 --> 00:53:42,887 Really? A naked surprise? 1138 00:53:42,920 --> 00:53:44,889 PERHAPS. 1139 00:53:44,922 --> 00:53:47,325 What is it like at 7:00 p.m.? 1140 00:53:47,358 --> 00:53:50,027 7:00? YES. YES, I CAN DO THAT. 1141 00:53:50,060 --> 00:53:51,429 See you then. 1142 00:53:51,462 --> 00:53:53,464 IN ORDER. 1143 00:53:56,066 --> 00:53:58,035 (kiss) 1144 00:53:58,068 --> 00:54:00,505 - THANK YOU SO MUCH. - HELLO. 1145 00:54:00,538 --> 00:54:02,006 You fall in love with him, ARE YOU NOT? 1146 00:54:02,039 --> 00:54:04,008 - You're falling hard. - PERHAPS. 1147 00:54:04,041 --> 00:54:06,377 How is he in the bag? 1148 00:54:06,411 --> 00:54:07,478 I DON'T KNOW. 1149 00:54:07,512 --> 00:54:09,013 OH MY GOD, WHAT? 1150 00:54:09,046 --> 00:54:11,449 You haven't slept Are you with him yet? 1151 00:54:12,450 --> 00:54:14,419 YOU ARE SUCH A GOOD GIRL. 1152 00:54:14,452 --> 00:54:17,355 When is the big date? 1153 00:54:17,388 --> 00:54:20,325 I think maybe tonight. 1154 00:54:20,358 --> 00:54:22,593 - OOH. - I DON'T KNOW. I could do that too, right? 1155 00:54:22,627 --> 00:54:25,696 - YES I THINK SO. - I AM PRETTY A VIRGIN REBORN. 1156 00:54:25,730 --> 00:54:27,698 I just want, I don't know, TEST THE WATER, 1157 00:54:27,732 --> 00:54:30,935 SEE EXACTLY WHAT I'm coming in. 1158 00:54:30,968 --> 00:54:32,937 HMM, INTERESTING. 1159 00:54:32,970 --> 00:54:35,440 You'll need it TO TAKE THE MAYBE Granny panties off. 1160 00:54:35,473 --> 00:54:37,442 - SHUT UP. - WHAT'S THERE? 1161 00:54:37,475 --> 00:54:39,777 - STOP IT. STOP IT. - LET ME SEE, LET ME SEE. 1162 00:54:39,810 --> 00:54:42,580 I thought we did it SOMETHING SPECIAL, BARBIE. 1163 00:54:42,613 --> 00:54:44,582 OH, DON'T CALL ME THAT. NOW, CLIVE, LOOK, 1164 00:54:44,615 --> 00:54:46,984 I TOLD YOU. I don't know how To make it even clearer: 1165 00:54:47,017 --> 00:54:50,087 I met someone else. I've moved on 1166 00:54:50,120 --> 00:54:52,623 And you have to go. 1167 00:54:52,657 --> 00:54:54,959 WHY? IS HE HERE? 1168 00:54:54,992 --> 00:54:57,428 WHERE IS HE? I WILL FIND THAT SON OF A BITCH. 1169 00:54:57,462 --> 00:54:58,996 CLIVE, NOW. 1170 00:55:00,665 --> 00:55:03,368 WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME, MY QUEEN? 1171 00:55:03,401 --> 00:55:06,337 NONE OF THE OTHER LADIES-- They don't call me back In about a month. 1172 00:55:06,371 --> 00:55:08,873 I can't pay my rent. I--I-- 1173 00:55:08,906 --> 00:55:10,875 I don't know what to do. 1174 00:55:10,908 --> 00:55:16,447 PLEASE PLEASE I DON'T HAVE THAT Had sex in three days. 1175 00:55:16,481 --> 00:55:18,883 PLEASE TAKE ME BACK. I AM SO SORRY. 1176 00:55:18,916 --> 00:55:21,386 I'll even let you do it WHAT YOU DO-- 1177 00:55:21,419 --> 00:55:23,821 The tickling in mine BOOM-BOOM, remember? 1178 00:55:23,854 --> 00:55:26,857 CLIVE, LOOK, I met someone else. 1179 00:55:26,891 --> 00:55:30,995 Yes, well, he did A Greek goddess body? 1180 00:55:31,028 --> 00:55:32,797 (grunts) 1181 00:55:32,830 --> 00:55:34,565 THIS IS A GODDESS. 1182 00:55:35,966 --> 00:55:39,470 MM, everything is fine HERE, BARBRA? 1183 00:55:39,504 --> 00:55:41,906 Everything's fine, Gerard. 1184 00:55:43,741 --> 00:55:45,710 GERARD? 1185 00:55:45,743 --> 00:55:48,813 This is the famous Gerard? 1186 00:55:48,846 --> 00:55:51,382 HE LOOKS-- He looks like a wet dog. 1187 00:55:51,416 --> 00:55:54,385 Look, is there something there? I can do for you, man? 1188 00:55:54,419 --> 00:55:57,422 THERE IS SOMETHING. You Americans are the same. 1189 00:55:57,455 --> 00:55:59,724 YOU THINK YOU CAN Just come in here 1190 00:55:59,757 --> 00:56:01,826 AND TAKE WHATEVER YOU WANT, YES? 1191 00:56:01,859 --> 00:56:04,395 I AM THE ONLY BOY'S TOY IN THIS CITY, OKAY? 1192 00:56:04,429 --> 00:56:07,164 I put the salami down AROUND THESE PARTS. 1193 00:56:07,197 --> 00:56:08,533 OK. 1194 00:56:08,566 --> 00:56:10,535 CLIVE, LOOK, 1195 00:56:10,568 --> 00:56:12,737 IF YOU DON'T GO I'll call the police. 1196 00:56:12,770 --> 00:56:15,740 You have selected the wrong CLIVE To moor, buddy. 1197 00:56:15,773 --> 00:56:18,409 YOU ARE ACTUALLY THE ONLY ONE CLIVE, I know, so... 1198 00:56:18,443 --> 00:56:20,377 Well, CLIVE. 1199 00:56:24,582 --> 00:56:27,151 NO. 1200 00:56:27,184 --> 00:56:29,487 - ARE YOU ALL RIGHT? - YES YES. 1201 00:56:29,520 --> 00:56:30,721 AGE. 1202 00:56:30,755 --> 00:56:33,190 OW, GOD. 1203 00:56:33,223 --> 00:56:36,126 I FIGHT FOR MY LOVE. 1204 00:56:36,160 --> 00:56:40,465 BARBIE, I always will LOVE YOU. 1205 00:56:46,971 --> 00:56:50,475 OH I USED TO LOVE IT When he hit me like that. 1206 00:56:50,508 --> 00:56:52,477 LIGHT UP, He's just bitter. 1207 00:56:52,510 --> 00:56:54,612 Let's get some ice cream ON THIS EYE. 1208 00:56:55,613 --> 00:56:57,582 Jake: So, Barbara, 1209 00:56:57,615 --> 00:56:59,584 LISTEN, BARBRA, I really need to get going. 1210 00:56:59,617 --> 00:57:01,819 BARBRA? 1211 00:57:36,921 --> 00:57:38,889 YOU KNOW, THAT WAS ME THINK, GERARD, 1212 00:57:38,923 --> 00:57:41,058 WE CAN TAKE THIS ARRANGEMENT TO THE NEXT LEVEL. 1213 00:57:41,091 --> 00:57:44,929 NAME IT AN ADVERTISEMENT. 1214 00:57:44,962 --> 00:57:46,931 OH WOW. 1215 00:57:46,964 --> 00:57:48,933 OH SHIT. 1216 00:57:48,966 --> 00:57:50,935 Yes, I thought I WOULD CHANGE 1217 00:57:50,968 --> 00:57:53,738 Something small MORE COMFORTABLE. 1218 00:57:53,771 --> 00:57:55,740 IN FACT. 1219 00:57:55,773 --> 00:57:59,043 YOU KNOW, THIS IS YOU A handsome young man. 1220 00:57:59,076 --> 00:58:02,580 BARBRA, I COMPLETELY I agree with you on THAT, I really do, 1221 00:58:02,613 --> 00:58:05,716 BUT SO MUCH I HATE To do this to you, 1222 00:58:05,750 --> 00:58:07,084 I HAVE TO GO. 1223 00:58:07,117 --> 00:58:09,954 I HAVE A PERSONAL COMMITMENT I have to come along. 1224 00:58:09,987 --> 00:58:11,956 A PERSONAL COMMITMENT? 1225 00:58:11,989 --> 00:58:15,159 You know, I'm the boss And I don't remember it 1226 00:58:15,192 --> 00:58:17,628 PLANNING ANOTHER MEETING. 1227 00:58:17,662 --> 00:58:20,230 You haven't forgotten it THAT I AM A PRIORITY Number one, right? 1228 00:58:20,264 --> 00:58:22,232 NO NOT AT ALL. 1229 00:58:22,266 --> 00:58:25,603 BUT IT'S A PERSONAL THING. IT'S NOT A PROFESSIONAL THING. 1230 00:58:25,636 --> 00:58:27,605 SO YOUR PERSONAL LIFE 1231 00:58:27,638 --> 00:58:30,507 Starts to get involved WITH YOUR WORK LIFE. 1232 00:58:35,045 --> 00:58:37,281 DO YOU HAVE AN IDEA HOW MANY MEN 1233 00:58:37,314 --> 00:58:39,316 I WOULD LOVE IT WITH ME NOW? 1234 00:58:39,349 --> 00:58:42,887 CLIVE FOR EXAMPLE. 1235 00:58:45,022 --> 00:58:47,558 I fired him. Did you know that? 1236 00:58:47,592 --> 00:58:49,827 HE WAS YOU BEFORE YOU WERE YOU. 1237 00:58:49,860 --> 00:58:51,629 Listen, I'm really sorry, BUT IT'S PER-- 1238 00:58:51,662 --> 00:58:55,833 I fired him AND HAS HIRED YOU. 1239 00:58:55,866 --> 00:58:58,669 MOUSE ASSURED ME THEY WOULD NOT CREATE ANY PROBLEMS. 1240 00:58:58,703 --> 00:59:00,638 Look, it's not a problem. IT'S A PERSONAL THING. 1241 00:59:00,671 --> 00:59:03,841 I have to come along. I really do, okay? 1242 00:59:03,874 --> 00:59:06,343 - BUT I COULD COME BACK. - HOW MUCH TIME? 1243 00:59:06,376 --> 00:59:08,045 - half past ten. - SHARP. 1244 00:59:08,078 --> 00:59:09,747 SHARP. 1245 00:59:09,780 --> 00:59:11,281 THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 1246 00:59:21,626 --> 00:59:23,594 NOW WANTS TO TAKE SHE TAKE THINGS TO THE NEXT LEVEL-- 1247 00:59:23,628 --> 00:59:25,362 THE NEXT LEVEL. 1248 00:59:25,395 --> 00:59:27,798 I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE YOU. I CAN'T. 1249 00:59:27,832 --> 00:59:30,701 I don't understand why you I didn't just sleep with her. 1250 00:59:30,735 --> 00:59:32,269 Right, JORGE? 1251 00:59:32,302 --> 00:59:35,072 PLEASE DO NOT BRING JORGE WITH YOU LIKE THAT. HE CAN'T EVEN SPEAK ENGLISH. 1252 00:59:35,105 --> 00:59:37,374 Look, I can't sleep WITH BARBRA. 1253 00:59:37,407 --> 00:59:40,010 I REALLY WANT TO SLEEPING WITH NORAH. 1254 00:59:40,044 --> 00:59:42,312 AND YOU CAN'T DO BOTH BECAUSE--? 1255 00:59:42,346 --> 00:59:45,616 I THINK I'M FALLING IN LOVE WITH HER. 1256 00:59:47,084 --> 00:59:48,352 WHAT? 1257 00:59:48,385 --> 00:59:50,855 JAKE, WHAT ARE YOU TALK ABOUT? 1258 00:59:50,888 --> 00:59:53,824 OKAY, THAT IS SO NOT GOOD. 1259 00:59:53,858 --> 00:59:57,728 I mean, there is NO HERE ROOM FOR LOVE, Or we're screwed. 1260 00:59:57,762 --> 00:59:59,730 I think it really is BEAUTIFUL MAN. 1261 00:59:59,764 --> 01:00:01,932 I'm so happy for you, man. THAT'S WONDERFUL. 1262 01:00:01,966 --> 01:00:05,636 I'm sorry, guys. I have to tell her LIKE TONIGHT. 1263 01:00:05,670 --> 01:00:08,072 I have to tell her THE WHOLE BOYS TOY STORY. I MUST-- 1264 01:00:08,105 --> 01:00:10,741 - I CAN'T DO THIS MORE ABOUT HER. - Okay, JAKE, AS YOUR MANAGER 1265 01:00:10,775 --> 01:00:14,044 AND YOUR PIMMER, I strongly advise against it AGAINST THAT. 1266 01:00:14,078 --> 01:00:17,381 EXCUSE ME, BUT I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU RECOMMEND MORE. 1267 01:00:17,414 --> 01:00:21,719 So what, you're easy Are you going to throw this all away? 1268 01:00:21,752 --> 01:00:23,721 Do you know how hard it is? I HAVE WORKED? 1269 01:00:23,754 --> 01:00:26,724 YOU KNOW, IT'S NOT THAT JUST ABOUT YOU, JAKE. 1270 01:00:26,757 --> 01:00:28,425 You got a commission Any job, right? 1271 01:00:28,458 --> 01:00:31,261 RONNIE GOT HIS MONEY BACK. He got his smart car. 1272 01:00:31,295 --> 01:00:33,731 Look, maybe BARBRA WILL UNDERSTAND. MAYBE YOU ARE RIGHT. 1273 01:00:33,764 --> 01:00:36,400 I was nice. Barb will flip. 1274 01:00:36,433 --> 01:00:39,069 She will ruin you. YOU WILL NEVER WORK AGAIN IN THIS TOWN. 1275 01:00:39,103 --> 01:00:42,172 You'll be lucky IF YOU CAN NAIL A 50 year old crack whore. 1276 01:00:42,206 --> 01:00:44,274 Well, maybe I don't want to TO MAKE THIS MORE, OKAY? 1277 01:00:44,308 --> 01:00:45,209 Maybe we don't need it All that stuff. 1278 01:00:45,242 --> 01:00:47,712 I'll find something else TO DO WITH MY LIFE. 1279 01:00:47,745 --> 01:00:49,747 OH YES, WITH YOURS WOMEN’S STUDIES DEGREE. 1280 01:00:49,780 --> 01:00:51,782 Yes, you could work IN A WOMEN’S HEALTH CLINIC 1281 01:00:51,816 --> 01:00:53,718 Examine moldy vagina. 1282 01:00:53,751 --> 01:00:56,020 - WHAT? - Do vaginas get moldy? 1283 01:00:56,053 --> 01:00:58,923 THIS IS DISGUSTING. Goodbye, mouse. 1284 01:00:58,956 --> 01:01:01,358 OH. I LOVE YOU. 1285 01:01:03,794 --> 01:01:05,295 LOVE YOU TOO. 1286 01:01:07,231 --> 01:01:08,799 (screaming) 1287 01:01:12,737 --> 01:01:14,839 - THIS IS IT. - YAY. 1288 01:01:17,041 --> 01:01:19,409 OH, MAMA MIA. 1289 01:01:19,443 --> 01:01:23,180 NOW I HAVE YOU, You son of a gun. 1290 01:01:23,213 --> 01:01:24,782 (laughs) YES. 1291 01:01:24,815 --> 01:01:26,784 You never said what Happened to your face. 1292 01:01:26,817 --> 01:01:29,720 OH YEAH, I kinda fell OUT OF BED THIS MORNING, Hit the ground. 1293 01:01:29,754 --> 01:01:31,722 - HELLO. - HELLO. 1294 01:01:31,756 --> 01:01:33,991 HELLO. WE HAVE A RESERVATION FOR TWO. The name is JAKE DYLAN. 1295 01:01:34,024 --> 01:01:36,827 - SAFE, RIGHT HERE. - GREAT. THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 1296 01:01:36,861 --> 01:01:38,829 Wait, you fell out? WAIT WHAT? 1297 01:01:38,863 --> 01:01:40,798 I just turned around ON THE SIDE. 1298 01:01:40,831 --> 01:01:42,800 OH, darling, THIS PLACE IT'S SO ROMANTIC. 1299 01:01:42,833 --> 01:01:44,802 - THANK YOU VERY MUCH. - YOU'RE WELCOME. 1300 01:01:44,835 --> 01:01:47,471 Norah: WOW. 1301 01:01:47,504 --> 01:01:50,007 THANK YOU. 1302 01:01:50,040 --> 01:01:52,509 - A DRINKS LIST? - YES. 1303 01:01:52,542 --> 01:01:54,378 Well, we won't be I need these. 1304 01:01:54,411 --> 01:01:56,280 HELLO. WHAT CAN I DO? MAKE YOU DRINK? 1305 01:01:56,313 --> 01:01:58,849 We take a bottle OF YOUR FINEST CHAMPAGNE, PLEASE. 1306 01:01:58,883 --> 01:02:00,517 -OH WOW. - Comes straight up. 1307 01:02:00,550 --> 01:02:03,921 Attention, ladies and gentlemen. He's trying to get me drunk. 1308 01:02:03,954 --> 01:02:06,123 BIG TIME. 1309 01:02:08,492 --> 01:02:10,895 THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 1310 01:02:13,430 --> 01:02:14,832 THANK YOU SO MUCH... 1311 01:02:14,865 --> 01:02:16,033 YES. 1312 01:02:16,066 --> 01:02:18,502 ...FOR SUCH HAVE A NICE EVENING. 1313 01:02:18,535 --> 01:02:21,338 YES, IT WAS GOOD. IT WAS REALLY GOOD. 1314 01:02:21,371 --> 01:02:23,273 ARE YOU ALL RIGHT? 1315 01:02:23,307 --> 01:02:26,510 I NEED TO TELL YOU SOMETHING And it's pretty important. 1316 01:02:26,543 --> 01:02:29,413 I HAVE TO TELL YOU ALSO SOMETHING. 1317 01:02:29,446 --> 01:02:31,782 Okay, but let me go first, BECAUSE I REALLY NEED IT TO GET THIS OUT. 1318 01:02:31,816 --> 01:02:34,251 WOMEN FIRST. 1319 01:02:35,920 --> 01:02:37,888 WHEN I MET YOU I ACCEPTED 1320 01:02:37,922 --> 01:02:40,424 That you were like that ANYONE ELSE WANTS TO IN THIS CITY. 1321 01:02:40,457 --> 01:02:43,060 I mean, anyone As sweet as you 1322 01:02:43,093 --> 01:02:45,062 IT'S USUALLY A PLAYBOY. 1323 01:02:45,095 --> 01:02:46,463 YES. 1324 01:02:46,496 --> 01:02:48,799 WHAT I TRY TO BE SAYED 1325 01:02:48,833 --> 01:02:51,836 I NEVER THOUGHT THAT I WOULD FEEL THAT 1326 01:02:51,869 --> 01:02:54,104 THE WAY I DO IT ABOUT YOU. 1327 01:02:54,138 --> 01:02:57,842 AND I'M SORRY THAT I HAVE CONDEMNED YOU 1328 01:02:57,875 --> 01:02:59,910 BEFORE I MET YOU. 1329 01:02:59,944 --> 01:03:02,813 Yes, I never thought that 1330 01:03:02,847 --> 01:03:04,815 I would feel that way ABOUT YOU EITHER, 1331 01:03:04,849 --> 01:03:07,517 OR ANY OTHER GIRL Incidentally, That's why I-- 1332 01:03:07,551 --> 01:03:10,254 * MY HEART 1333 01:03:10,287 --> 01:03:12,823 * CAN HARDLY START 1334 01:03:12,857 --> 01:03:15,492 * EVERY STRIKE 1335 01:03:16,861 --> 01:03:18,829 * WHAT I FEEL 1336 01:03:18,863 --> 01:03:22,900 * IS THE HEAT IN YOUR EYES * 1337 01:03:22,933 --> 01:03:26,503 * LET IT SHINE DOWN ON ME... * 1338 01:03:33,643 --> 01:03:35,612 I AM NOT-- I AM NOT-- 1339 01:03:35,645 --> 01:03:37,614 I'm not used to that THIS RELATIONSHIP-- 1340 01:03:37,647 --> 01:03:39,616 YOU KNOW, ACTUALLY-- 1341 01:03:39,649 --> 01:03:42,619 Actually feeling things YOU KNOW? 1342 01:03:42,652 --> 01:03:46,356 BUT I LIKE IT. 1343 01:03:46,390 --> 01:03:48,458 It's nice, isn't it? 1344 01:03:48,492 --> 01:03:50,460 YES. 1345 01:03:50,494 --> 01:03:52,529 YES, IT IS. 1346 01:03:57,935 --> 01:04:00,971 - Norah: Great job, everyone. - (Jake sighs) 1347 01:04:01,005 --> 01:04:03,407 - (Ronnie sighs) - YES? 1348 01:04:03,440 --> 01:04:05,475 THAT WAS GREAT. 1349 01:04:08,012 --> 01:04:10,347 - OH, THAT WAS GREAT. - THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 1350 01:04:10,380 --> 01:04:11,681 - I LOVED IT. - YES, TRIPPY, MAN. 1351 01:04:11,715 --> 01:04:15,152 ALL THESE ROUTES WILL BE ADDED IN FULL TO MY SEXUAL REPERTOIRE. 1352 01:04:15,185 --> 01:04:17,154 WHY DO YOU THINK I started yoga? 1353 01:04:17,187 --> 01:04:19,890 OH WOW. 1354 01:04:21,959 --> 01:04:23,928 Sweetie, are you okay? You look stressed. 1355 01:04:23,961 --> 01:04:26,330 ACTUALLY I REALLY HAVE TO TALK TO THEM ABOUT SOMETHING. 1356 01:04:26,363 --> 01:04:28,332 YES, OF COURSE. I'll just get my things. 1357 01:04:28,365 --> 01:04:31,668 IN ORDER. 1358 01:04:31,701 --> 01:04:33,670 -Ronnie: WOW. - Jake: SHE'S GREAT, right? 1359 01:04:33,703 --> 01:04:37,207 - Mouse: SHE'S A CATCH. - Dude, dude, we're in trouble. 1360 01:04:37,241 --> 01:04:39,910 Ronnie: SHIT. Isn't that so...? 1361 01:04:39,944 --> 01:04:41,345 SERIOUS. 1362 01:04:47,985 --> 01:04:49,486 READY, SWEET. 1363 01:04:49,519 --> 01:04:52,022 - Mouse: HI. - MOM? 1364 01:04:52,056 --> 01:04:54,191 -NORAH. -BARBRA. 1365 01:04:54,224 --> 01:04:56,360 GERARD. 1366 01:04:57,727 --> 01:05:00,330 -NORAH. - MOM, WHAT ARE YOU Are you doing here? 1367 01:05:00,364 --> 01:05:02,332 "MAMA"? 1368 01:05:02,366 --> 01:05:04,668 OH MY GOD, MOM, This is JAKE. 1369 01:05:04,701 --> 01:05:08,205 That's the guy I've been I'll tell you about it. 1370 01:05:08,238 --> 01:05:09,673 ONE MOMENT, Who is Gerard? 1371 01:05:09,706 --> 01:05:12,276 - I AM. I'm GERARD. - NO NO NO NO. 1372 01:05:12,309 --> 01:05:15,579 GERARD IS JAKE, DARLING. 1373 01:05:15,612 --> 01:05:17,948 And Gerard stopped me LAST NIGHT. 1374 01:05:17,982 --> 01:05:19,950 JAKE, WHAT IS SHE? TALK ABOUT? 1375 01:05:19,984 --> 01:05:21,685 MOM, WHAT ARE ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 1376 01:05:21,718 --> 01:05:24,554 JAKE, you would Would you like to explain? NO NO, LET ME DO IT. 1377 01:05:24,588 --> 01:05:26,556 You know, I just love it A GOOD STORY. 1378 01:05:26,590 --> 01:05:28,558 Darling, you see, 1379 01:05:28,592 --> 01:05:32,262 JAKE HAS RECENTLY Was employed by me. 1380 01:05:32,296 --> 01:05:33,663 YOUR EMPLOYEE? 1381 01:05:33,697 --> 01:05:37,567 MORE OR LESS A PERSONAL EMPLOYEE, YOU COULD SAY. 1382 01:05:37,601 --> 01:05:41,171 H-HE'S A B-B-BOY T-T-- 1383 01:05:41,205 --> 01:05:43,473 He is a toy for boys LIKE ME, 1384 01:05:43,507 --> 01:05:46,643 ONLY YOUNGER AND, 1385 01:05:46,676 --> 01:05:49,346 At the bulge in his sweat, I think he has a bigger penis. 1386 01:05:49,379 --> 01:05:50,714 YOU ARE AN ESCORT? 1387 01:05:50,747 --> 01:05:53,083 - NO NO, LOOK-- - YES. 1388 01:05:53,117 --> 01:05:55,219 I can explain all of this. 1389 01:05:55,252 --> 01:05:57,421 - IN ONE WORD. - PERHAPS. 1390 01:05:57,454 --> 01:06:00,424 YES, ME AND A RANGE FROM OTHER LADIES 1391 01:06:00,457 --> 01:06:02,759 Pay JAKE very well TO JOIN US 1392 01:06:02,792 --> 01:06:05,462 TO VARIOUS FUNCTIONS AND EVENTS. 1393 01:06:05,495 --> 01:06:09,099 BUT WHAT I DIDN'T KNOW UNTIL LAST NIGHT 1394 01:06:09,133 --> 01:06:11,601 SO IS HE KNEW YOU. 1395 01:06:11,635 --> 01:06:13,603 THIS IS WHAT YOU SAID AN EVENT HOST. 1396 01:06:13,637 --> 01:06:15,739 Well, look, ORGANIZE THESE DATES 1397 01:06:15,772 --> 01:06:18,575 IT'S LIKE HOSTING AN EVENT SO... 1398 01:06:18,608 --> 01:06:21,011 - YES. - TOO TRUE. THIS IS REAL-- 1399 01:06:21,045 --> 01:06:24,614 When Gerard failed APPEAR AS PROMISED LAST NIGHT, 1400 01:06:24,648 --> 01:06:26,616 I was forced to downgrade CLIVE HERE 1401 01:06:26,650 --> 01:06:30,154 Who helped me? TRACK IT OUT. 1402 01:06:30,187 --> 01:06:34,091 I have to say, JAKE, PUT ME UP IS A THING 1403 01:06:34,124 --> 01:06:37,027 BUT TO RECORD ME FOR MY OWN DAUGHTER-- 1404 01:06:39,096 --> 01:06:41,231 I'm sorry, okay? I didn't know YOUR DAUGHTER. I HAD NO-- 1405 01:06:41,265 --> 01:06:43,300 Are you apologizing to her? 1406 01:06:43,333 --> 01:06:46,136 NO NO, I'm not apologizing TO HER, OKAY? I didn't know SHE WAS YOUR MOTHER. 1407 01:06:46,170 --> 01:06:49,106 I wanted to tell you: OKAY? I ALMOST-- 1408 01:06:49,139 --> 01:06:52,776 OH LIKE I ALMOST HAD SEX Last night with you? OH WAIT, I DID. 1409 01:06:52,809 --> 01:06:55,179 OH, DISGUSTING. I LIKE THIS. 1410 01:06:55,212 --> 01:06:57,181 GET THIS-- 1411 01:06:57,214 --> 01:07:00,517 Look, NORAH, I had no idea She was your mother, okay? 1412 01:07:00,550 --> 01:07:02,786 - YOU HAVE TO BELIEVE ME. -OH! 1413 01:07:02,819 --> 01:07:04,788 JESUS. 1414 01:07:04,821 --> 01:07:06,790 GOD DAMMIT. 1415 01:07:06,823 --> 01:07:08,792 - (mouse whines) - Ronnie: RIGHT IN THE-- 1416 01:07:08,825 --> 01:07:11,161 SHIT. 1417 01:07:11,195 --> 01:07:14,564 JAKE BABY, 1418 01:07:14,598 --> 01:07:17,434 I gave you a few SIMPLE RULES 1419 01:07:17,467 --> 01:07:19,836 AND YOU RIGHT NOW Couldn't follow them. 1420 01:07:19,869 --> 01:07:21,838 NOT JUST YOU fooled me, 1421 01:07:21,871 --> 01:07:23,373 You are embarrassed MY DAUGHTER. 1422 01:07:23,407 --> 01:07:26,410 And no one makes a mess WITH MY FAMILY. 1423 01:07:26,443 --> 01:07:27,611 HAVE IT? 1424 01:07:27,644 --> 01:07:29,613 I KNOW. THAT WAS A complete mistake. 1425 01:07:29,646 --> 01:07:31,615 I never wanted to hurt YOU OR YOUR DAUGHTER. 1426 01:07:31,648 --> 01:07:34,318 OH, JAKE, you just screwed up THE WRONG LADY. 1427 01:07:34,351 --> 01:07:37,687 You fucking stay AWAY FROM MY DAUGHTER 1428 01:07:37,721 --> 01:07:39,489 And you fucking stay AWAY FROM ME. 1429 01:07:39,523 --> 01:07:42,192 Well, BARBRA, IT WILL Be a little problem, 1430 01:07:42,226 --> 01:07:44,528 BECAUSE I AM SOMETHING IN LOVE WITH YOUR DAUGHTER RIGHT NOW. 1431 01:07:44,561 --> 01:07:46,530 Man, you should have done that Thought of that 1432 01:07:46,563 --> 01:07:50,167 BEFORE YOU BEGIN Going out with her mother. CLIVE. 1433 01:07:52,202 --> 01:07:55,739 (giggles) I'm back in business, baby. 1434 01:07:55,772 --> 01:07:58,675 Who is the man now, Gerard? 1435 01:07:58,708 --> 01:08:02,579 - CLIVE. - COME, MY QUEEN. 1436 01:08:02,612 --> 01:08:04,881 SHE WILL BE FORGOTTEN ABOUT THAT IN THE MORNING. 1437 01:08:04,914 --> 01:08:07,151 - CLIVE. - SMALL PENIS. 1438 01:08:10,587 --> 01:08:12,556 *YOU STOLEN MY HEART 1439 01:08:12,589 --> 01:08:16,126 * AND YOU PUT IT IN A BOX * 1440 01:08:16,160 --> 01:08:18,128 *Threw it into the river 1441 01:08:18,162 --> 01:08:20,130 * AND FILLED WITH STONES * 1442 01:08:20,164 --> 01:08:22,499 * NOW I'm down and out AND EMPTY * 1443 01:08:22,532 --> 01:08:25,535 * BUT DESIGNED UNDER THE BUS * 1444 01:08:25,569 --> 01:08:30,540 * AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO * 1445 01:08:30,574 --> 01:08:32,542 * I will buy a gun 1446 01:08:32,576 --> 01:08:34,911 * AND I WILL KILL CUPID * 1447 01:08:34,944 --> 01:08:37,314 * Because he missed me WITH THE LOVE SHOT * 1448 01:08:37,347 --> 01:08:39,783 * AND JOIN ME THE STUPID * 1449 01:08:39,816 --> 01:08:41,785 *OH, I'm going to get a gun 1450 01:08:41,818 --> 01:08:44,721 * AND I WILL KILL CUPID * 1451 01:08:44,754 --> 01:08:47,157 * Because he missed me WITH THE LOVE SHOT * 1452 01:08:47,191 --> 01:08:50,760 * AND HIT ME WITH THE STUPID * 1453 01:08:52,662 --> 01:08:55,532 * And I feel stupid 1454 01:09:03,907 --> 01:09:06,576 *OH, I was deceived 1455 01:09:06,610 --> 01:09:09,213 * THOUGHT YOU WERE SHOULD BE * 1456 01:09:09,246 --> 01:09:11,215 * BUT YOU ARE NOT 1457 01:09:11,248 --> 01:09:13,750 *OH, YOU ARE SO... 1458 01:09:13,783 --> 01:09:16,220 * YOU ARE A LIAR AND A THIEF* 1459 01:09:16,253 --> 01:09:18,222 *OH, YOU'RE A LIAR 1460 01:09:18,255 --> 01:09:20,757 * YOUR PANTS ARE ON FIRE... * 1461 01:09:20,790 --> 01:09:22,759 Ronny: COME ON, JUMP OFF HIS COCK. 1462 01:09:22,792 --> 01:09:24,761 The guy is in pain. LOOK AT HIM. 1463 01:09:24,794 --> 01:09:27,931 He hurts. WE NEED THE OLD JAKE BACK. 1464 01:09:27,964 --> 01:09:31,201 OLD JAKE IS GONE. I am a man with only one wife NOW, OK? 1465 01:09:31,235 --> 01:09:33,203 Damn, JAKE-- HE'S NOT GONE. 1466 01:09:33,237 --> 01:09:35,972 He is oppressed. HE IS THERE. 1467 01:09:36,005 --> 01:09:38,542 What happened to the JAKE? THIS WAS PIONEED 1468 01:09:38,575 --> 01:09:41,678 THE DOUBLE-DECKER THREE WAY, HH? 1469 01:09:41,711 --> 01:09:43,680 What happened to the JAKE? THIS WAS BANNED 1470 01:09:43,713 --> 01:09:45,682 FROM SEVEN DIFFERENT Sorority houses? 1471 01:09:45,715 --> 01:09:47,684 What happened to the JAKE? 1472 01:09:47,717 --> 01:09:49,853 This was necessary every two weeks S.T.D. TESTS? 1473 01:09:49,886 --> 01:09:51,621 -EWW. - I don't miss taking these. 1474 01:09:51,655 --> 01:09:53,690 - YES, BUT YOU MISSED OUT The rest of it, right? - YES. 1475 01:09:53,723 --> 01:09:57,327 Damn, JAKE, We'll get you LAYED TONIGHT. 1476 01:09:57,361 --> 01:10:00,964 Guys, it's Monday. WHAT DO WE DO NOW ON A MONDAY? 1477 01:10:00,997 --> 01:10:02,966 GOD DAMMIT. 1478 01:10:02,999 --> 01:10:05,502 WE HAVE THIS HOUSE For another night, right? 1479 01:10:05,535 --> 01:10:08,004 - HOUSE PARTY! - YES! I LIKE THIS. 1480 01:10:08,037 --> 01:10:10,006 All right, shit, take a shower AND SHAVE, BIG GUY. 1481 01:10:10,039 --> 01:10:12,909 YOU TOO, JORGE. ALL WILL Getting laid tonight. 1482 01:10:12,942 --> 01:10:14,911 (dance music plays) 1483 01:10:14,944 --> 01:10:16,913 Ronny: MY HEART IS BEATING SO QUICK NOW. 1484 01:10:16,946 --> 01:10:18,915 See, that's why I don't do it WANT TO BE TOO CLOSE-- 1485 01:10:18,948 --> 01:10:20,984 Because I think we both do Could have a heart attack. 1486 01:10:21,017 --> 01:10:22,986 YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? 1487 01:10:23,019 --> 01:10:25,655 OH MAN, I HAVE TO GO Check on my friend. 1488 01:10:25,689 --> 01:10:27,657 - PLEASE DON'T GO ANYWHERE. - OH, OKAY. 1489 01:10:27,691 --> 01:10:30,260 DON'T MOVE. WAIT RIGHT HERE FOR ME, OK? 1490 01:10:30,294 --> 01:10:32,262 DON'T MOVE. 1491 01:10:32,296 --> 01:10:35,365 MY GOD, WHAT'S WRONG? WITH YOU? 1492 01:10:35,399 --> 01:10:37,534 - WHAT? - You can't swing your tail IN THIS PLACE 1493 01:10:37,567 --> 01:10:39,035 WITHOUT BEATING SOME Hot piece of ass. 1494 01:10:39,068 --> 01:10:43,039 NO NO, I don't know, man. I think we disturbed the chi In this place, buddy. 1495 01:10:43,072 --> 01:10:44,841 What the hell is that chi? 1496 01:10:44,874 --> 01:10:47,477 CHI-- IT'S THIS YOGA STUFF NORAH TOLD ME, YOU KNOW? 1497 01:10:47,511 --> 01:10:50,547 It has to do with how Good mood and good energy – THIS KIND OF THINGS. 1498 01:10:50,580 --> 01:10:52,649 I'm actually looking into buying a few BAD CHAKRAS HERE, MAN. 1499 01:10:52,682 --> 01:10:54,284 I WILL NOT BE THE LAST. 1500 01:10:54,318 --> 01:10:56,286 CHAKRAS? I THOUGHT They gave you gas. 1501 01:10:56,320 --> 01:10:57,921 Look, my blonde is talking NOW TO SOMEONE ELSE. 1502 01:10:57,954 --> 01:11:01,391 - THAT SUCKS. - THAT really sucks. You go do something, okay? 1503 01:11:01,425 --> 01:11:03,293 I can't leave you standing You look sad over here. 1504 01:11:03,327 --> 01:11:06,029 - Put out your yoga gear On these girls, man. - OKAY. 1505 01:11:06,062 --> 01:11:08,031 THEY LOVE YOGA THINGS. 1506 01:11:08,064 --> 01:11:10,033 OKAY, I'll see you in a second. 1507 01:11:10,066 --> 01:11:12,068 WAIT WAIT WAIT, HAVE YOU LEARNED? 1508 01:11:12,101 --> 01:11:14,538 - HOW DO I SUCK YOUR OWN COCK? - OH, OKAY, EVERYTHING'S OKAY. 1509 01:11:14,571 --> 01:11:16,940 Because if I could Suck my own cock, I just WOULDN'T WORK TOO. 1510 01:11:16,973 --> 01:11:18,942 - OH MY GOD, JAKE. - OH DEAR GOD. 1511 01:11:18,975 --> 01:11:21,311 What the fuck, This is your party. WHAT A COINKY DINK. 1512 01:11:21,345 --> 01:11:23,313 I HAD NO IDEA That you lived here. 1513 01:11:23,347 --> 01:11:25,782 - THIS IS MY FRIEND RONNIE. I can't believe you're here. - HELLO. 1514 01:11:25,815 --> 01:11:28,051 - THIS IS GREAT. - YES, MY FRIEND MANDY HERE-- SHE WAS LIKE THAT, 1515 01:11:28,084 --> 01:11:31,755 “Okay, let’s not go at all TO THIS PARTY BECAUSE THERE IS There won't be any cute guys there. 1516 01:11:31,788 --> 01:11:34,358 I thought, “YES, THIS WILL BE COMPLETE SWEET GUYS HERE. 1517 01:11:34,391 --> 01:11:36,760 AND THAT TOTALLY EXISTS SWEET GUYS HERE. AND thank God 1518 01:11:36,793 --> 01:11:38,762 I painted my nails Matches my dress, right? 1519 01:11:38,795 --> 01:11:41,865 - YES YOU DID. - So this is your party. THIS MUST BE YOUR PLACE. 1520 01:11:41,898 --> 01:11:43,867 YOU WANT TO GIVE ME A TOUR, Maybe show me your bedroom? 1521 01:11:43,900 --> 01:11:45,969 - ACTUALLY I WAS JUST-- - YOU PLAYED BASEBALL, right? 1522 01:11:46,002 --> 01:11:48,004 YOU WANT To show me your balls? OKAY, THEN GO. 1523 01:11:52,542 --> 01:11:55,412 REALLY? YOU WANT TO SEE THESE THINGS? 1524 01:11:55,445 --> 01:11:58,415 MY BASEBALLS OR THESE BALLS? 1525 01:12:02,819 --> 01:12:06,122 OH WOW. 1526 01:12:06,155 --> 01:12:08,124 WHOO! 1527 01:12:08,157 --> 01:12:09,292 WHOO-HOO! 1528 01:12:11,160 --> 01:12:14,431 THAT IS So much fun, right? IT'S GOING SUPER WELL. 1529 01:12:14,464 --> 01:12:16,433 (breathes in) MM. 1530 01:12:16,466 --> 01:12:18,435 OKAY, ALL CLEAR. 1531 01:12:18,468 --> 01:12:20,470 OK. 1532 01:12:20,504 --> 01:12:23,607 OKAY, THAT'S COMPLETE NOT LIKE ME. I NEVER Meet up with random guys 1533 01:12:23,640 --> 01:12:26,843 BECAUSE I AM COMPLETE PARANOID ABOUT S.T.D.s AND TEENAGE PREGNANCY AND-- 1534 01:12:26,876 --> 01:12:29,479 - NOT THAT I AM A TEENAGER. - NO, THAT'S GOOD. 1535 01:12:29,513 --> 01:12:32,382 YET YOU CAN Never be too sure ESPECIALLY WITH JERN. 1536 01:12:32,416 --> 01:12:34,684 Wow. WHY NOT ME Put on some music? WHAT DO YOU THINK? 1537 01:12:34,718 --> 01:12:37,621 OH MY GOD, Music would be great. This is so romantic. 1538 01:12:37,654 --> 01:12:39,623 - AND GUESS WHAT. - WHAT? 1539 01:12:39,656 --> 01:12:41,891 I've been practicing SOMETHING JUST FOR YOU. 1540 01:12:41,925 --> 01:12:44,127 You don't say that. WHAT IS IT? 1541 01:12:44,160 --> 01:12:46,029 IT'S SAID THE BELGIAN pretzel. 1542 01:12:46,062 --> 01:12:48,031 I learned about it here NAUGHTY YOGA WEBSITE. 1543 01:12:48,064 --> 01:12:51,067 YOU JUST TAKE YOUR ARMS SUCK LIKE THAT Position your legs like this. 1544 01:12:51,100 --> 01:12:53,069 YOU DID Have you practiced? OH WOW. 1545 01:12:53,102 --> 01:12:54,471 Is that too advanced? FOR YOU? 1546 01:12:54,504 --> 01:12:57,607 I KNOW, SOME KAMA SUTRA SET FOR BEGINNERS IF THIS WOULD WORK BETTER. 1547 01:12:57,641 --> 01:12:59,543 IT JUST REMINDS ME FROM NORAH. 1548 01:12:59,576 --> 01:13:00,777 YOU THINK FROM NORAH? 1549 01:13:00,810 --> 01:13:03,413 YES YES, THAT'S ME. 1550 01:13:03,447 --> 01:13:05,415 Okay, guess what? You definitely shouldn't do that, 1551 01:13:05,449 --> 01:13:07,417 BECAUSE SHE IS LIKE, A LOT ABOUT YOU 1552 01:13:07,451 --> 01:13:09,886 AND I AM HERE AND I DO THIS YOGA POSE WHICH IS REALLY HARD. 1553 01:13:09,919 --> 01:13:12,422 She wouldn't even do it IT CAN. TOGETHER WE SIMPLY DO BETTER. 1554 01:13:12,456 --> 01:13:14,157 YOU KNOW, WE CLICK. (snaps fingers) 1555 01:13:14,190 --> 01:13:17,527 Look, I'm really sorry. I just can't do this WITH YOU NOW. 1556 01:13:17,561 --> 01:13:20,096 Okay, well, if RIGHT NOW IT'S NOT WORKING, HOW ABOUT TOMORROW? 1557 01:13:20,129 --> 01:13:21,731 I AM FREE AFTER WORK ON MONDAY. TUESDAY I AM-- 1558 01:13:21,765 --> 01:13:23,467 - RIGHT. - BUT I CAN SEE YOU AFTER YOGA. 1559 01:13:23,500 --> 01:13:25,635 I HAVE MINE ON WEDNESDAY MANICURE AND PEDICURE, 1560 01:13:25,669 --> 01:13:27,471 BUT WE CAN DO IT Immediately afterwards. AND THEN-- 1561 01:13:27,504 --> 01:13:29,539 - (door opens and closes) - Okay, bye. 1562 01:13:37,714 --> 01:13:40,850 LOOK WHAT YOU HAVE DONE. You made him worse. 1563 01:13:40,884 --> 01:13:43,553 Okay, I'm sorry, okay? I'M SORRY. 1564 01:13:43,587 --> 01:13:45,522 I thought there would be a party Make him feel better. 1565 01:13:45,555 --> 01:13:47,824 I didn't know He developed a conscience. Don't worry, Jakey. 1566 01:13:47,857 --> 01:13:50,527 THESE EGGS I MAKE-- THERE ARE MAGIC EGGS. 1567 01:13:50,560 --> 01:13:52,496 RONNIE’S FAMOUS EGGS – THEY WILL HEAL YOU. 1568 01:13:52,529 --> 01:13:54,498 I DON'T WANT THE MAGIC EGGS, RONNIE. 1569 01:13:54,531 --> 01:13:56,866 I JUST WANT NORAH BACK, MAN. 1570 01:13:56,900 --> 01:13:59,869 - Well, yes, the Almighty Christ. - God, life sucks without her. 1571 01:13:59,903 --> 01:14:02,238 Well, yes, crying lizards, Go get her back if you want Then I want her. 1572 01:14:02,271 --> 01:14:04,073 DON'T JUST SIT HERE AND WHILE. 1573 01:14:04,107 --> 01:14:05,975 Jake: If you put it like that – CERTAINLY NOT A PROBLEM. 1574 01:14:06,009 --> 01:14:08,545 I'll just run over TO YOUR PLACE AND KNOCK AT THE DOOR, 1575 01:14:08,578 --> 01:14:09,979 Tell her I'm sorry BECAUSE YOU ARE A MALE ESCORT 1576 01:14:10,013 --> 01:14:11,715 AND HOPEFULLY Will she take me back? THIS IS STUPID. 1577 01:14:11,748 --> 01:14:14,551 ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS Show her that you have changed. 1578 01:14:14,584 --> 01:14:16,553 OH MY GOD people 1579 01:14:16,586 --> 01:14:19,255 She will never go on a date NEVER AGAIN A MALE ESCORT. 1580 01:14:19,288 --> 01:14:22,559 I AM NOT EVEN MORE A MALE ESCORT. I AM UNEMPLOYED. 1581 01:14:22,592 --> 01:14:24,828 AND I LIVE AGAIN IN THIS DUMP. 1582 01:14:24,861 --> 01:14:27,063 HEY MAN, THIS IS MY HOUSE. 1583 01:14:27,096 --> 01:14:30,133 Maybe you could be the pimp And I will be the chaperone. 1584 01:14:30,166 --> 01:14:31,635 DO YOU THINK She's going to date a pimp? 1585 01:14:31,668 --> 01:14:34,270 Come on, mouse, You're not helping. 1586 01:14:34,303 --> 01:14:37,941 I'M SERIOUS. JORGE COULD SHOW HIM THE ROPES. 1587 01:14:37,974 --> 01:14:40,977 THAT'S ACTUALLY NOT A TERRIBLY BAD IDEA. 1588 01:14:41,010 --> 01:14:43,079 What, pimp mice out? 1589 01:14:43,112 --> 01:14:45,715 I can't pimp the mouse. She already had sex with her ALL IN LOS ANGELES. 1590 01:14:45,749 --> 01:14:49,285 - HEY, I didn't sleep WITH YOU. - NOT YET. 1591 01:14:49,318 --> 01:14:52,288 - MOUSE, bear with me. THIS COULD WORK. - HUH? 1592 01:14:52,321 --> 01:14:54,624 Okay, think about it. 1593 01:14:54,658 --> 01:14:56,793 YOUNG TOY COMPANIES, RIGHT? 1594 01:14:56,826 --> 01:15:00,697 YOUNG TOY COMPANIES nationwide. 1595 01:15:00,730 --> 01:15:02,699 YOU AND I COULD RUN The company, okay? 1596 01:15:02,732 --> 01:15:04,868 We're going to hire a few people. They will be our escorts. 1597 01:15:04,901 --> 01:15:08,538 IT WILL BE COMPLETE A legitimate business, right? 1598 01:15:08,572 --> 01:15:10,540 Okay, look, we're keeping it 1599 01:15:10,574 --> 01:15:12,542 Up and down ALL THE TIME-- 1600 01:15:12,576 --> 01:15:14,578 NO SEXUAL CONTACT EVERY KIND. 1601 01:15:14,611 --> 01:15:16,279 OUR ESCORTS CARE THE KIND OF SERVICE 1602 01:15:16,312 --> 01:15:18,648 THESE LONELY WOMEN EVERYWHERE IN THIS CITY ARE LOOKING FOR. 1603 01:15:18,682 --> 01:15:20,717 WE'RE ACTUALLY PRETTY GOOD DON'T WE DO THIS? 1604 01:15:20,750 --> 01:15:25,121 Well, we kind of had A solid reputation except for you Screwed up with BARBRA. 1605 01:15:25,154 --> 01:15:27,290 BUT THAT'S EXACTLY IT I'm talking about it, right? 1606 01:15:27,323 --> 01:15:30,193 - WE COULD BE PARTNERS – YOU AND ME. - Do you like sex partners? 1607 01:15:30,226 --> 01:15:33,329 - NO, NO SEX PARTNERS. BUSINESS PARTNERS. - WITH SEX? 1608 01:15:33,362 --> 01:15:35,599 NO, NOT WITH SEX. 1609 01:15:35,632 --> 01:15:37,601 OK, THANKS, MOUSE. 1610 01:15:37,634 --> 01:15:40,003 Well, maybe you have something, BUT THE QUESTION IS, 1611 01:15:40,036 --> 01:15:42,772 WHAT WILL NORAH THINK? 1612 01:15:42,806 --> 01:15:45,041 I DON'T KNOW. 1613 01:15:45,074 --> 01:15:48,111 I have no idea, man. But it's worth a try, right? 1614 01:15:48,144 --> 01:15:50,346 Come on, Ronnie. I NEED YOUR HELP About that, buddy. 1615 01:15:50,379 --> 01:15:52,315 WE HAVE SECURITY DEPOSIT FROM LOFT. 1616 01:15:52,348 --> 01:15:55,151 THAT COULD COVER OUR COSTS In the beginning, right? 1617 01:15:55,184 --> 01:15:57,153 YOU COULD BE THE C.F.O., MAN. 1618 01:15:57,186 --> 01:15:59,656 AND AND AND AND WE CAN FIND 1619 01:15:59,689 --> 01:16:02,125 A VERY VERY ATTRACTIVE YOUNG LADY TO BE YOUR ASSISTANT. 1620 01:16:03,993 --> 01:16:07,030 I don't know if we kept it REALLY, YOU KNOW, MAYBE HAVE AN OFFICE ROOM... 1621 01:16:07,063 --> 01:16:10,299 COME ON, SAY YES. PLEASE. 1622 01:16:17,406 --> 01:16:19,142 Come on, buddy. 1623 01:16:22,378 --> 01:16:24,648 PERHAPS? 1624 01:16:27,751 --> 01:16:29,619 All right, I'm down. LET'S PIM SOME HOS. 1625 01:16:31,420 --> 01:16:33,623 AHH. 1626 01:17:49,332 --> 01:17:52,068 - YOUNG TOY COMPANIES. - YOUNG TOY COMPANIES. HOW CAN I HELP YOU? 1627 01:17:52,101 --> 01:17:54,070 - (phone ringing) - ABSOLUTELY. CAN YOU HOLD PLEASE? 1628 01:17:54,103 --> 01:17:55,772 YES, BUT CAN YOU HOLD PLEASE? THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 1629 01:17:55,805 --> 01:17:57,140 YOUNG TOY COMPANIES. HOW CAN I HELP YOU? 1630 01:17:57,173 --> 01:17:59,142 Okay, that's what you said YOU WERE LOOKING FOR 1631 01:17:59,175 --> 01:18:01,477 THE INTELLECTUAL TYPE? 1632 01:18:01,510 --> 01:18:03,479 Well, he didn't BE A GENIUS, 1633 01:18:03,512 --> 01:18:05,481 BUT HE SHOULD BE ABLE TO DO IT HAVE A CONVERSATION. 1634 01:18:05,514 --> 01:18:08,084 Sure, yes. Okay, that sounds good. 1635 01:18:08,117 --> 01:18:10,186 WE WILL.. GET EVERYTHING IS RIGHT. IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE? 1636 01:18:10,219 --> 01:18:11,855 MUSCLES. He must have muscles. 1637 01:18:11,888 --> 01:18:13,022 MUSCLES? 1638 01:18:13,056 --> 01:18:15,725 MM, YOURS WILL WORK. 1639 01:18:22,531 --> 01:18:25,468 LIGHT UP. OH OK. 1640 01:18:25,501 --> 01:18:28,437 YES, ABSOLUTELY. OKAY, WE WILL E-MAIL YOU SOME PICTURES 1641 01:18:28,471 --> 01:18:30,273 AND SOME STATISTICS WITHIN ONE HOUR. 1642 01:18:30,306 --> 01:18:31,474 PERFECT. 1643 01:18:31,507 --> 01:18:34,110 NOW THE MOUSE RECEIVES EVERYTHING HERE THE NECESSARY INFORMATION-- 1644 01:18:34,143 --> 01:18:37,513 A CREDIT CARD, EVERYTHING ELSE YOU NEED. 1645 01:18:37,546 --> 01:18:40,483 - I want you to relax. - THANK YOU. 1646 01:18:40,516 --> 01:18:43,086 THAT'S ENOUGH. That’s what we’re here for – 1647 01:18:43,119 --> 01:18:45,922 PROVIDE TO YOU The service you need, right? 1648 01:18:45,955 --> 01:18:48,191 THERE IS NO WAY I would show up alone 1649 01:18:48,224 --> 01:18:51,227 TO A CLASSY DINNER PARTY At Barbra's house Skypes. 1650 01:18:51,260 --> 01:18:55,264 IT WOULD Social suicide, darling, SPECIALLY FOR US PUMAS. 1651 01:18:55,298 --> 01:18:57,366 Wow, wait. DID YOU SAY BARBRA SKYPES? 1652 01:18:57,400 --> 01:18:59,235 YES. DO YOU KNOW HER? 1653 01:18:59,268 --> 01:19:01,537 YES. NO NO NO, I NOT-- I don't know her. I know your daughter 1654 01:19:01,570 --> 01:19:04,040 NORAH. 1655 01:19:04,073 --> 01:19:07,376 - SO-- - WILL SHE BE THERE? 1656 01:19:07,410 --> 01:19:09,178 I ACCEPT. 1657 01:19:09,212 --> 01:19:12,515 I WILL WAIT FOR THIS EMAIL WITH HIGH EXPECTATIONS. 1658 01:19:12,548 --> 01:19:15,318 - HAVE IT? - NATURALLY. 1659 01:19:15,351 --> 01:19:17,320 - SEE YOU. - WITHIN ONE HOUR. THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 1660 01:19:17,353 --> 01:19:19,322 - THANK YOU VERY MUCH. - WATCH OUT. 1661 01:19:19,355 --> 01:19:21,224 YOU MUST CHECK OUT THE SHOP JUST ONE HOUR, OK? 1662 01:19:21,257 --> 01:19:23,492 - ONE HOUR-- CHECK OUT THE SHOP JUST FOR ONE HOUR. - NO NO. 1663 01:19:23,526 --> 01:19:26,229 NO NO NO, YOU CAN'T. You can't interfere with this party. You will be arrested. 1664 01:19:26,262 --> 01:19:30,066 - WHY? - I hate to say this, JAKE, BUT I AGREE WITH RONNIE. 1665 01:19:30,099 --> 01:19:32,869 - I won't be arrested. - You're going to cause a scene WITH THESE HIGH CLASS PEEPS. 1666 01:19:32,902 --> 01:19:36,005 And we worked way too hard JUST TO GET SOMETHING YOUR CUSTOMERS HERE. 1667 01:19:36,039 --> 01:19:38,274 - You will destroy the business. - All right, it's cool. 1668 01:19:38,307 --> 01:19:40,276 - STOP. - You're right. YOU ARE RIGHT. 1669 01:19:40,309 --> 01:19:42,278 I'M SORRY. I wasn't thinking. 1670 01:19:42,311 --> 01:19:44,948 - GOD, YOU WILL KILL THE BUSINESS. - YOU ARE RIGHT. 1671 01:19:46,349 --> 01:19:47,917 - GIVE ME YOUR KEYS. Give me your keys. - NO. OW. 1672 01:19:47,951 --> 01:19:50,119 - HEY, JAKE-- - ONE HOUR. 1673 01:19:50,153 --> 01:19:52,121 JAKE, okay, I'll drive. I WILL DRIVE. 1674 01:19:52,155 --> 01:19:54,290 I'll take you with me. PLEASE. 1675 01:19:55,992 --> 01:19:57,827 Well, then I'll go too. 1676 01:20:00,029 --> 01:20:02,531 LISTEN people, I really do I appreciate you coming with me, 1677 01:20:02,565 --> 01:20:04,934 BUT YOU DIDN'T To do that, okay? 1678 01:20:04,968 --> 01:20:08,037 Well, if you want Go down in flames, 1679 01:20:08,071 --> 01:20:09,939 AT LEAST I WANT TO LOOK. 1680 01:20:09,973 --> 01:20:13,877 Okay, okay, look, The trick is to take action Like you belong, okay? 1681 01:20:13,910 --> 01:20:15,879 Act like you belong. YOU LOOK REALLY GOOD. 1682 01:20:15,912 --> 01:20:17,881 -JAKE. - THANKS. YOU SEE REALLY GOOD. 1683 01:20:17,914 --> 01:20:20,216 - THANKS GUY. - ARE YOU READY? WILL YOU DO THIS? 1684 01:20:20,249 --> 01:20:22,418 - YOU WILL Break a few hearts? - AS READY AS I WILL EVER BE. 1685 01:20:22,451 --> 01:20:25,388 - HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TO SWITZERLAND? - NO NO, I DIDN'T. 1686 01:20:25,421 --> 01:20:27,924 REALLY? What about older men? 1687 01:20:27,957 --> 01:20:29,926 Have you ever been on a date? AN OLDER MAN, NORAH? 1688 01:20:29,959 --> 01:20:31,961 NOT AS OLD AS YOU. 1689 01:20:31,995 --> 01:20:34,363 Okay, remember, just act How you fit in, man. 1690 01:20:34,397 --> 01:20:37,934 Hello, CHRISTIE, PRETTY DRESS. Good Lord. 1691 01:20:37,967 --> 01:20:41,437 Hello sir. BELVEDERE. HEY, buddy, listen, I-- 1692 01:20:41,470 --> 01:20:44,340 -JAKE, OH MY GOD, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? - WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? 1693 01:20:44,373 --> 01:20:47,176 I AM ACTUAL LOOKING FOR NORAH. Have you seen her anywhere? 1694 01:20:47,210 --> 01:20:48,577 -NORAH? - YES. 1695 01:20:48,611 --> 01:20:50,479 - JAKE, YOU ARE NOTHING BUT AN idiot. - DOOFUS. 1696 01:20:50,513 --> 01:20:52,181 - A MAN HAS NEVER HURT ME AS YOU HAVE IT. - ALWAYS. 1697 01:20:52,215 --> 01:20:54,283 It's like you take my heart, YOU PUT IT IN THE DRYER 1698 01:20:54,317 --> 01:20:56,886 - AND THEY DON'T USE IT TOO FABRIC SOFTENER. - FABRIC SOFTENER. 1699 01:20:56,920 --> 01:20:59,155 HEY HOW ARE YOU? 1700 01:20:59,188 --> 01:21:01,157 HEY MAN. 1701 01:21:01,190 --> 01:21:03,159 -HEY, GERARD. -HELLO, HELEN. 1702 01:21:03,192 --> 01:21:05,028 - WHAT A PLEASANT SURPRISE. - GOOD TO SEE YOU. 1703 01:21:05,061 --> 01:21:07,931 Yeah, hey, you did it AN EXCELLENT CHOICE REMOVE BARBRA. 1704 01:21:07,964 --> 01:21:09,899 - She's so high maintenance. - THIS IS GREAT. 1705 01:21:09,933 --> 01:21:11,901 YES, NOW YOU ARE FREE FOR A REAL WOMAN LIKE ME. 1706 01:21:11,935 --> 01:21:14,971 You look great, Helen. I would like to talk about it, BUT ANOTHER TIME. 1707 01:21:15,004 --> 01:21:17,473 Actually, I'm looking FOR BARBRA'S DAUGHTER NORAH. Have you seen her anywhere? 1708 01:21:17,506 --> 01:21:20,009 - SHE'S A LITTLE YOUNG FOR YOU, DON'T YOU THINK? - Kylie: MM-HM. 1709 01:21:20,043 --> 01:21:21,978 What's wrong with you, KYLIE? Have you seen her anywhere? 1710 01:21:22,011 --> 01:21:23,446 - SERIOUSLY? - SERIOUSLY. 1711 01:21:23,479 --> 01:21:26,215 What, are you Prince Charming? NOW? Will you come? WIN HER BACK? 1712 01:21:26,249 --> 01:21:28,017 - GOD. - You're so pathetic. 1713 01:21:28,051 --> 01:21:29,085 THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 1714 01:21:31,687 --> 01:21:34,123 HEY, BIG GUY, QUICK QUESTION-- 1715 01:21:34,157 --> 01:21:36,125 OH, IT'S YOU. 1716 01:21:36,159 --> 01:21:38,962 (stutter) What's wrong, poop pole? 1717 01:21:38,995 --> 01:21:40,930 WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? 1718 01:21:40,964 --> 01:21:43,632 HAVE A PARTY. 1719 01:21:43,666 --> 01:21:46,102 GOD. HAVE YOU SEEN NORAH EVERYWHERE? 1720 01:21:47,103 --> 01:21:48,938 YES? 1721 01:21:48,972 --> 01:21:51,207 HIGH IN MY BUTT. 1722 01:21:51,240 --> 01:21:54,410 - Woman: JAKE. - HELLO. 1723 01:21:54,443 --> 01:21:58,614 HELLO, HEY. GERARD DEPARDOUCHE IN THE FLESH. 1724 01:21:58,647 --> 01:22:01,150 Fancy seeing you here, right? 1725 01:22:01,184 --> 01:22:04,220 We just had a threesome IN THE BATHROOM WITH YOUR GRANDMOTHER. 1726 01:22:04,253 --> 01:22:07,356 SERIOUSLY. LET THE PAST BE PAST, NO? 1727 01:22:07,390 --> 01:22:09,292 - REALLY? - YES. 1728 01:22:09,325 --> 01:22:11,294 PSYCH. 1729 01:22:11,327 --> 01:22:13,396 I caught him mentally. I TOLD YOU. 1730 01:22:13,429 --> 01:22:17,400 YOU'RE SO STUPID. HE'S SO... HE'S STUPID, MOSH. 1731 01:22:17,433 --> 01:22:18,667 You dropped your cock BACK THERE. 1732 01:22:18,701 --> 01:22:21,104 - You might want to get it. - THAT'S FUNNY. I LIKE IT. 1733 01:22:21,137 --> 01:22:24,740 Well, what would you say? IF I HAD A 100 FOOT YACHT 1734 01:22:24,773 --> 01:22:27,310 Down at the marina I'm waiting for you and me 1735 01:22:27,343 --> 01:22:29,312 RIGHT NOW? 1736 01:22:29,345 --> 01:22:31,314 What is that? 1737 01:22:31,347 --> 01:22:34,450 99' 8" LARGER THAN YOUR PENIS? 1738 01:22:34,483 --> 01:22:37,086 RIGHT? GET IT? 1739 01:22:42,358 --> 01:22:46,062 NORAH DARLING, YOU CAN'T Just sit here and sulk. 1740 01:22:46,095 --> 01:22:48,731 You become a distraction FOR THE WHOLE PARTY. 1741 01:22:48,764 --> 01:22:51,000 Mom, I don't want to mingle with people WITH YOUR OLD FRIENDS. 1742 01:22:51,034 --> 01:22:52,668 Well, that's not easy Sit here and sulk. 1743 01:22:52,701 --> 01:22:54,737 - HELLO, LADIES. -GERARD-- 1744 01:22:54,770 --> 01:22:57,640 -JAKE. - JAKE, WHAT ARE YOU Are you doing here? 1745 01:22:57,673 --> 01:23:02,045 HELLO. Look, can I just? TALK TO THEM, PLEASE, REALLY QUICK? 1746 01:23:02,078 --> 01:23:06,182 JAKE, look, just get out FROM HERE. DON’T USE ME SICK CLIVE ON YOU. 1747 01:23:06,215 --> 01:23:08,384 Look, BARBRA, I know I broke your rules, okay? 1748 01:23:08,417 --> 01:23:10,753 BUT FOR WHAT IT'S WORTH, I had no idea it was NORAH YOUR DAUGHTER. 1749 01:23:10,786 --> 01:23:12,755 I would never have done that If I didn't do it, I bailed Care about her so much. 1750 01:23:12,788 --> 01:23:14,657 I think you should go. 1751 01:23:14,690 --> 01:23:17,426 JUST LISTEN TO ME PLEASE FOR A SECOND? 1752 01:23:17,460 --> 01:23:19,062 FORGIVENESS. 1753 01:23:20,629 --> 01:23:22,798 You just have to listen to me For a second, okay? 1754 01:23:22,831 --> 01:23:26,369 WHAT COULD YOU POSSIBLY SAY THAT COULD CHANGE SOMETHING? 1755 01:23:26,402 --> 01:23:27,570 I HAVE CHANGED. 1756 01:23:27,603 --> 01:23:30,106 YOU KNOW WHAT? ENOUGH. ENOUGH. 1757 01:23:30,139 --> 01:23:32,608 All right, I knew it You were a playboy, 1758 01:23:32,641 --> 01:23:35,378 BUT YOU SET ME DOWN WITH YOUR STUPID CHARM. 1759 01:23:35,411 --> 01:23:37,513 You lied to my face. 1760 01:23:37,546 --> 01:23:40,349 You had sex WITH MY MOTHER'S FRIENDS. You had sex with my mother. 1761 01:23:40,383 --> 01:23:42,418 AND NOW ALL THESE PEOPLE Look at me as if 1762 01:23:42,451 --> 01:23:44,553 "POOR GIRL, She never saw it coming. 1763 01:23:44,587 --> 01:23:46,622 NORAH, I HATE IT interject, darling, 1764 01:23:46,655 --> 01:23:48,624 BUT JAKE never slept WITH ME. 1765 01:23:48,657 --> 01:23:50,693 God, HELEN, I really do AM GRATEFUL, 1766 01:23:50,726 --> 01:23:53,162 - BUT I DON'T THINK IT IS HELP NOW. - We just kissed. 1767 01:23:53,196 --> 01:23:55,164 WE DON'T HAVE SEX, 1768 01:23:55,198 --> 01:23:57,566 BUT YOU DID IT A FANTASTIC PINKIE POOL. 1769 01:23:57,600 --> 01:24:01,370 Neither did we. HE WOULDN'T LET ME TOO Handle his package. 1770 01:24:01,404 --> 01:24:04,840 I swear, darling, I just licked HIS FEET. 1771 01:24:04,873 --> 01:24:06,275 HE WAS PERFECT GENTLEMAN. 1772 01:24:06,309 --> 01:24:08,644 GOOD GOOD, LOOK, NORAH, 1773 01:24:08,677 --> 01:24:10,179 We didn't do that Have sex too. 1774 01:24:10,213 --> 01:24:12,381 I APPRECIATE IT 1775 01:24:12,415 --> 01:24:14,383 Guys, I really do. THAT'S NICE. 1776 01:24:14,417 --> 01:24:16,385 BUT NONE OF THIS IS IMPORTANT 1777 01:24:16,419 --> 01:24:20,223 BECAUSE YOU WERE SILENT Dozens of women see BEHIND MY BACK. 1778 01:24:20,256 --> 01:24:23,092 Look, I just did it WHAT I HAD TO DO To get through, okay? 1779 01:24:23,126 --> 01:24:25,861 I provided a service FOR THESE LADIES, YOU KNOW? 1780 01:24:25,894 --> 01:24:27,863 Look, I've always been that way A GENTLEMAN. 1781 01:24:27,896 --> 01:24:30,099 I have always treated her WITH THE HIGHEST RESPECT. 1782 01:24:30,133 --> 01:24:33,436 BUT I NEVER I took care of each of them. It was just a job. 1783 01:24:33,469 --> 01:24:36,272 How do I know it's not you? WILL JUST TURN INTO GERARD? 1784 01:24:36,305 --> 01:24:39,775 Yes, is it JAKE or GERARD? WHAT IS IT TODAY? 1785 01:24:39,808 --> 01:24:42,278 - CLIVE. - EXCUSE ME. 1786 01:24:43,912 --> 01:24:47,516 HOW DO I KNOW THIS? 1787 01:24:47,550 --> 01:24:49,518 BECAUSE-- 1788 01:24:49,552 --> 01:24:51,520 BECAUSE I LOVE YOU. 1789 01:24:51,554 --> 01:24:54,223 Audience: AWW. 1790 01:24:54,257 --> 01:24:57,426 This is coming from a man Who hasn't said this before? EVERYONE IN THEIR ENTIRE LIFE-- 1791 01:24:57,460 --> 01:25:00,829 Well, except for Ronnie, BUT HE'S MORE LIKE A BROTHER KIND OF LOVE. 1792 01:25:00,863 --> 01:25:03,299 - I LOVE YOU BRO. - THANKS GUY. 1793 01:25:03,332 --> 01:25:05,668 Look, I love you so much, 1794 01:25:05,701 --> 01:25:07,670 THERE IS NOTHING I wouldn't do it for you. 1795 01:25:07,703 --> 01:25:09,738 And I'm just asking for that ONE MORE CHANCE, PLEASE-- 1796 01:25:09,772 --> 01:25:11,907 ONE CHANCE TO MAKE YOU HAPPY. 1797 01:25:11,940 --> 01:25:15,444 And I never, ever will I will disappoint you again. 1798 01:25:19,182 --> 01:25:21,550 I can't help it. 1799 01:25:21,584 --> 01:25:23,719 I LOVE YOU TOO. 1800 01:25:23,752 --> 01:25:27,256 - Woman: YES! - (applause) 1801 01:25:27,290 --> 01:25:30,826 HOT – THAT’S HOT. WHOO! 1802 01:25:32,495 --> 01:25:35,831 RONNIE, COME HERE. 1803 01:25:35,864 --> 01:25:37,500 WHAT? 1804 01:25:37,533 --> 01:25:39,535 NO, COME CLOSER. 1805 01:25:40,536 --> 01:25:42,771 - WHAT? - COME CLOSER. 1806 01:25:43,872 --> 01:25:45,474 WHAT? 1807 01:25:50,246 --> 01:25:52,848 I TOLD YOU I drive a Porsche? 1808 01:25:54,483 --> 01:25:57,420 OH GOD TELL ME IT'S RED. 1809 01:25:57,453 --> 01:25:59,855 YOU KNOW WHAT? I like Porsche. THIS ONCE WHEN I-- 1810 01:26:01,524 --> 01:26:06,195 THEY CALL ME PEACH, LIKE FRUIT, BUT SWEETER. 1811 01:26:06,229 --> 01:26:07,563 AND YOU? 1812 01:26:07,596 --> 01:26:10,233 (British accent) GEORGE – GEORGE FROM LONDON. 1813 01:26:10,266 --> 01:26:11,667 OH. 1814 01:26:12,701 --> 01:26:14,403 OH YES. 1815 01:26:15,771 --> 01:26:18,874 OH, THIS IS WONDERFUL. WHAT ARE YOU DOING, GUYS? 1816 01:26:18,907 --> 01:26:21,244 - Um, we're just celebrating. - YES. 1817 01:26:21,277 --> 01:26:23,246 We are simply overcome WITH HAPPINESS. 1818 01:26:23,279 --> 01:26:27,483 We'll meet there. WE'RE GOING TO BE JUST LIKE, TWO MINUTES OR SO. 1819 01:26:27,516 --> 01:26:29,485 OR MAYBE LONGER. 1820 01:26:29,518 --> 01:26:31,487 Probably more like that 10 OR 15 MINUTES. 1821 01:26:31,520 --> 01:26:34,790 OW. MAYBE Half an hour, okay? 1822 01:26:34,823 --> 01:26:37,393 Okay, well, CONTINUE. 1823 01:26:37,426 --> 01:26:39,762 YES, WE ARE I'm on your trail. WE ARE THERE. 1824 01:26:39,795 --> 01:26:41,129 - OKAY. - WE ARE WITH YOU. 1825 01:26:41,163 --> 01:26:43,299 - IN ORDER. - YOU LOOK GREAT IN A SUIT. NO, YOU DO. 1826 01:26:43,332 --> 01:26:45,368 - I DO NOT LIE. YOU LOOK AMAZING. - BYE. 1827 01:26:45,401 --> 01:26:48,003 You do too, NORAH. 1828 01:26:48,036 --> 01:26:50,439 - SEE YOU LATER. - Okay, bye. 1829 01:26:54,009 --> 01:26:57,380 *Can't you admit that? THAT THIS IS BEAUTIFUL? * 1830 01:26:58,647 --> 01:27:01,717 *OH, darling, I would STAY HERE WITH ME* 1831 01:27:01,750 --> 01:27:03,719 * FOREVER, IF I COULD 1832 01:27:03,752 --> 01:27:07,490 *BUT I DON'T THINK I could handle the price* 1833 01:27:10,959 --> 01:27:12,928 * SO BE MY BABY 1834 01:27:12,961 --> 01:27:15,864 * GIGOLO 1835 01:27:15,898 --> 01:27:20,869 * AND GO WHERE I WILL GO* 1836 01:27:20,903 --> 01:27:24,239 * AND WHEN YOU COME Right when I call * 1837 01:27:25,874 --> 01:27:27,843 * IT WILL NOT LAST 1838 01:27:27,876 --> 01:27:31,246 * ANYTIME 1839 01:27:35,318 --> 01:27:37,953 * I'm not asking you MARRY ME* 1840 01:27:37,986 --> 01:27:40,756 * IT WOULD BE EASY SO MUCH FUN* 1841 01:27:40,789 --> 01:27:44,727 * PLAY FOR A FEW DAYS * 1842 01:27:44,760 --> 01:27:47,596 * WHEN I SAW YOU IN THE MAGAZINE * 1843 01:27:47,630 --> 01:27:49,532 * COULDN'T BREATHE, I BELIEVE... * 1844 01:27:49,565 --> 01:27:50,966 IS THIS MY BEARD TRIMMER? 1845 01:27:50,999 --> 01:27:53,802 (beats) YES. 1846 01:27:56,672 --> 01:27:58,641 SORRY, MAN. 1847 01:27:58,674 --> 01:28:01,810 GET THIS – OUT! YOU --! 1848 01:28:03,679 --> 01:28:05,881 --, YOU LITTLE BITCH. 1849 01:28:05,914 --> 01:28:07,950 WE CAN'T DO THIS NINE TIMES. 1850 01:28:10,453 --> 01:28:14,089 * YOU LOOK SO GOOD IN BLACK AND WHITE * 1851 01:28:14,122 --> 01:28:15,591 *YOU KNOW THIS FEELING... * 1852 01:28:15,624 --> 01:28:18,026 I DON'T WEAR ANY UNDERWEAR, YOU KNOW. 1853 01:28:18,060 --> 01:28:20,363 (crew laughs) 1854 01:28:20,396 --> 01:28:23,432 So that's your genius IDEA, EH, PEEREE GURU-- 1855 01:28:23,466 --> 01:28:24,733 (expletive deleted) 1856 01:28:24,767 --> 01:28:27,803 (mocking murmur) 1857 01:28:27,836 --> 01:28:29,538 DEAD, ABORTION, DEAD. 1858 01:28:29,572 --> 01:28:31,574 THIS DATE IS NOT Runs well at all. 1859 01:28:33,476 --> 01:28:36,845 Also, I'm going on a date TONIGHT WITH NORAH. 1860 01:28:36,879 --> 01:28:38,847 WE GO To the horse toad. 1861 01:28:38,881 --> 01:28:40,849 (laughter) 1862 01:28:40,883 --> 01:28:43,118 - What a bar - Vivian: HORN-- AWESOME. 1863 01:28:43,151 --> 01:28:46,021 - (car horn sounds) - (tires squeak) 1864 01:28:48,991 --> 01:28:51,360 OH, COMING? DIDN’T YOU SAID SIMULATE? 1865 01:28:51,394 --> 01:28:54,430 - Woman: SIMULATE, GUYS. -OH. 1866 01:28:56,599 --> 01:28:59,034 (couch squeaks) 1867 01:29:01,837 --> 01:29:03,806 - Mouse: What about BARB? - What about Barb? 1868 01:29:03,839 --> 01:29:05,508 THAT WAS ME THINK ALSO. 1869 01:29:05,541 --> 01:29:07,476 Yes, you will work IN A WOMEN’S HEALTH CLINIC 1870 01:29:07,510 --> 01:29:09,978 - EXAMINATION OF MOLDY VAGINAS. - moldy vagina? 1871 01:29:10,012 --> 01:29:11,980 WELCOME TO FIRST CLASS. 1872 01:29:12,014 --> 01:29:14,550 (laughs) DAMN. 1873 01:29:14,583 --> 01:29:17,119 - WHY? - (both laugh) 1874 01:29:17,152 --> 01:29:19,955 STANISLAVSKY. 1875 01:29:19,988 --> 01:29:21,957 - I TOOK HIM ONCE - (loud bang) D IT. 1876 01:29:21,990 --> 01:29:24,760 RIGHT, ROBERT? 1877 01:29:24,793 --> 01:29:26,762 (both laugh) 1878 01:29:26,795 --> 01:29:28,464 HIS-S-S-STORY. 1879 01:29:28,497 --> 01:29:30,132 (laughs) 1880 01:29:30,165 --> 01:29:33,602 * WE'LL SEE HOW IT GOES 1881 01:29:35,471 --> 01:29:39,442 * SO BE MY BABY GIGOLO 1882 01:29:40,809 --> 01:29:43,979 * AND GO WHERE I WANT TO GO 1883 01:29:45,948 --> 01:29:47,916 * WHY DON’T YOU PICK UP 1884 01:29:47,950 --> 01:29:51,019 * ALL YOUR CLOTHES? 1885 01:29:51,053 --> 01:29:53,422 * AND WE WILL SEE 1886 01:29:53,456 --> 01:29:56,391 * HOW TO DO IT 1887 01:29:58,093 --> 01:30:01,497 What kind of apartment? In there, for heaven's sake? 1888 01:30:01,530 --> 01:30:03,198 * OOH OOH OOH OOH 1889 01:30:03,231 --> 01:30:06,034 * AND GO WHERE I GO 1890 01:30:08,136 --> 01:30:11,607 * AND WHEN YOU COME Right when I call * 1891 01:30:13,241 --> 01:30:15,511 * IT WILL NOT LAST 1892 01:30:15,544 --> 01:30:20,616 * ANYTIME 1893 01:30:24,553 --> 01:30:29,758 * EVER.